Thursday, March 8, 2012

For God's sake - what am I doing in Rome????

For that matter, what am I doing in Europe? Do they have car ferries to Europe? That take buses too? Huh ... I never realized how Americanized Europe has become.

I wanted to go to Greece, to Athens, but there it is on a big sign. I'm in Rome.

It was the Ripple, I know it was. I don't like buses, so I compensated. I thought Ripple was sort of a weak liqueur, but evidently not. Two bottles put me down for the count. And out for a week, I guess. How long does it take a ferry to get to Europe from north Alabama?

They kicked me off the bus. End of the line, the driver said. Guess he got stopped by the Mediterranean. That sucks, I might have made it to Greece.

"Excuse me sir, do you speak English?"

"Honey, I'll speak whatever you want me to."

"How generous. I don't want to be here. In Rome. I was aiming for Athens. Any idea how I can get there?"

"Why, it's on down the road a piece. Just rent a car."

"A car? Not a boat?"

"Whatchoo want a boat fur?"

"So I won't drown?"

"You sure are askin' a passel of questions. You in north Jawja, darlin'. You more likely to fall off a mountain than drown."

"Georgia! How the hell did I get to Georgia?"

"There you go with them questions agin. Somethin' wrong with you lady."

A fine gentleman he turned out to be! Least he could have done was point me toward a rental place. Georgia! Okay, I need to go to Atlanta,that's where I need to go. It's got an airport, I hear.

Seems like I was supposed to do something for Lori this morning, but I can't quite recall ... Doesn't matter, she doesn't deserve it, putting all my private business on the internet! How dare she!!!

I'm a live and let live kind of person but she's gone too far this time. She can keep Farts. I'll settle for Greece. :-)




*cough*

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