Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Social Media and You

Oh you dear, brilliant, almost a writing sensation YOU!

You’ve written your 37,000 word opus about the sixteen year old salamander shifter and her quest to save the world from the evil newts, her desire to get her first kiss from the wildly misunderstood bad boy, indy rock star/boxer Moody Mike Malone and her persistent yeast infection which smells funky and makes her change her underwear every third page….

You have a cover that features soulful salamander eyes super-imposed over a picture of frolicking teens…

Now you got to take to social media and sell that thing.

That’s where an ego the size of the Grand Canyon comes in. Also Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads, your personal blog and every other bit of social media there is.

People won’t buy your book if they don’t know it’s out there. The best thing you can do is let people know by telling them. Constantly.

“Hey all! I just released ALL MY YEASTY YESTERDAYS on Amazon. Right now. Only 12.99 for ebook and you can read all about Felicity Fairweather and her dangerous life running from the fae while being romanced by the hottest bad boy virgin on the planet!!”

“Hey All! Did I mention ALL MY YEASTY YESTERDAYS is on sale right now? I’ve worked really hard on it and my mom says it’s the best salamander shifting she’s ever read!!”

“Um… my book. It’s out now. ALL MY YEASTY YESTERDAYS. When you read it you’ll see how hot it is. Kind of like a mix of Divergent and Twilight with some Hunger Games thrown in. And salamanders.”


That’s effective social media usage right there but it could be done better. Here’s my suggestion:

"Yo People With Brains, Taste and Large Sexual Organs! My book ALL MY YEASTY YESTERDAYS is being made into a movie by my 14 year old cousin's company and it will debut on You Hoo Tube tomorrow. I'm a freaking star!!!!"

See the difference?

"Do you know I've gotten over 5 Amazon reviews? And they're all 5 stars. And the nasty bitch who suggested they were all written by the same person because the all misspell doopleganger  is just a mean, nasty bitch whose jealous of my success. And I mean you, Aunt Irna!!"

Yeah, that's the way to do it. 

Tomorrow we'll discuss reviews. How to handle them. Especially if they don't really like your precious. 


  1. Oh lord ... reviews ... oh lord ....

  2. "Tomorrow we'll discuss reviews. How to handle them."

    Oh boy... I can't wait!