Two Old Farts Talking Romance

An Old Farty History

2012-02-10T12:13:00.000-08:00

I've been friends with Carolyn since we were in short pants and catching tadpoles with Henry Robinson down by the old creek. Carolyn was my BFF even back then and she never said a word when I stole anything resembling chocolate from her lunchbox.

When we got a little older and moved from tadpoles to actually trying to catch Henry Robinson himself, we remained BFFs. We used to experiment with make-up together and sneak out late at night, rolling our skirts at the waists to make them shorter and hanging down at the Tastee-Freez while hoping to catch the eye of an innappropriate Bad Boy.

When Henry Robinson left juvie for the second time and then deflowered Carolyn in the back seat of the family station wagon, I was the first person Carolyn told, and the fifth person that Henry told. It was unfortunate that Henry never learned the meaning of discretion and therefore caused Carolyn the shame of being known as "that loose Bama hussy."

But it didn't change our friendship, at all. I still stole all her chocolate and Carolyn still pretended to ignore it.

In college we drifted apart for awhile. I joined the local chapter of Students for Purity and Carolyn pledged Sigma Delta Slut. We shared the occasional English class and teacher's assistant but our heady days as BFFs seemed to be over.

It was in our junior year that things changed. I discovered that male students who studied poetry were better at cunnilingus than any of the Purity students and soon I became a Slut too.

After college we went to different places at different times but always found our way back together. All it's ever taken is Carolyn calling and saying "chocolate covered praline" and I'm right there.

We went through our divorces together, our illicit affairs and out of wedlock babies. I stood by Carolyn when she tried a sex change for shits and giggles and then when my attraction to her turned scary, when she changed back. We've stalked ex-boyfriends together, done mushrooms together and owned a pizzeria for awhile.

It's just who we are. And I still steal her chocolate.

Writing the Porn

2012-02-08T18:40:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to write porn. Honest to Gawd, penis/vagina, wet and sloppy with every act described in loving detail porn.

I'd rather shoot myself in the face.

There is nothing quite as tedious as writing a penis and a vagina and the things they do. Because ultimtely the act itself isn't half as interestiing as the things that lead up to it.

So why am I doing it? Because I want to write a specific story for a specific line at a specific publisher. And it needs to be porn.

Gads, might make me swear off sex forever.

Interview with Lila Mae Johnson, owner and operator of Lila's Cut and Shear

2012-02-06T06:18:00.000-08:00

With Song of Life, we have a small town, a younger man (Cas) and older woman (Sunny) who must face teir pasts, their future and a town of watchful eyes.

To get the full and true picture of events that unfolded, the best place to go is the beauty parlor. and that would be Lila's Cut and Shear. So we introduce Lila Mae Johnson who has agreed to answer a few of our questions.

You've lived in Nevis for all your life. Did you always know Sunny?

Heavens, child, we went to school together. Took the bus from Nevis to Eufala every day. 'Course, there wasn't much socializing 'tween whites and blacks back then, at least not in public. Even though the schools had been integrated. But Sunny never really cared about all that. More'n once she embarrassed me by taking the seat beside me and talking about the fish we'd caught or some such thing. My mama worked at the Crossroad and old Mr. Douglas let us live in one of the rooms in the basement. Sunny and me did a lot of hiking and even more talking, but it wasn't something I wanted known.Things were different back then. Folks complain nowadays, but I'm here to tell you it's better than it was.

You knew Sunny and Jim her husband. What was the general impression of them around town?

Oh, Jim Douglas, he was the local Prince Charming. Even at school in Eufala, he stood out from the other boys. I'll always maintain it was that hair of his. Pure waste if you ask me. He always kept it covered with a cap unless they was singing the national anthem. A woman would have killed for hair that color. Sunny made a decent princess too, being blond and all, but gradually it become known she was more than a princess, she'd grown into a queen. Now Jim, he stayed Prince Charming, and for sure he could charm the socks off even the men. But that don't put bread on the table, does it?

When did you first notice Cas?

Let's see now, when did I first notice Cas ... reckon it was the first day he come to town. It was early, but I open early, don't see the need to be keeping those fancy city hours. He's a fine looking man, makes a woman wish she was younger, you know? Sunny probably wished that too, but Cas, he don't care nothing about her age, he just loves her. He's a good man, just like my Stan.

What was the general consensus about this young, good looking stranger?

Only one set against him was Ennis and Ida Ratcliff. Ennis, he likes to jump to conclusions and Ida mostly parrots what her brother says without thinking it through. 'Course Wayland Edwards didn't like Sunny taking up with Cas one bit. He'd talked himself into believing Sunny was his woman, no matter what she said to him. Ain't it strange how one thing leads to another? But most folks liked Cas, he gave them no reason not to.

How did people first figure out that Sunny was losing her heart to this young man?

Couldn't say, I'm sure. Might of been when they went out to dinner at Mimi's. Brenda was their waitress and that woman could squeeze blood from a stone if it caught her interest and she was sure interested in Cas and Sunny.

When Cas's father, Jose Aguilar, came to town, how did you hear and what did you hear?

Didn't hear much. The man snuck into town and then he snuck back out and I never knew what happened til Crystal McLaren came rushing into my shop, saying Ennis done arrested Cas.

Did you have any idea that the events that occurred, would or could?

Ma'am, Nevis might be small, but you got southerners living here, decendents of soldiers, moonlighters and hunters. Nothing surprises me anymore.

Do you think the feelings of the town have changed toward Cas now?

Why sure. I don't think anyone was real set against Cas in the first place, except maybe Ida Ratcliff, because everyone knows Ennis is an idiot.

Is there anything you'd like to add?

I've lived awhile and I'm hoping I'll be living a good while more. I seen people fall in love - I got a husband of my own that I love to death. But I ain't never seen nothing like what happened between Sunny and Cas. I never seen two people fit each other better. It's like they grew up together, known each other all their lives. Never seen anything like it. Gives me faith in human kind, it does. Sure does.

Wow!

2012-02-05T16:42:00.000-08:00

This has really been an excellent birthday week! Not only for the release of Song of Life, but I also received the cover for Mariposa, my next release. I think it's beautiful, what do you think?

Discrimination is Alive and Well

2012-02-04T16:19:00.000-08:00

I want to announce I will not be entering any of my books into the More Than Magic contest, run by Romance Writers Ink, a chapter of RWA.

Okay, the truth is I wasn't going to enter anyway, because I've never heard of these folks. It might be my loss, but somehow I don't think so.

You see, RWI took a big step backward and are busily discriminating against a certain genre of romance writers.

From Courtney Milan's blog:

Apparently, it’s possible for the MTM contest to get entrants’ books in the hands of diverse judges from multiple RWA chapters who are comfortable with all types of romances and heat levels. You can write M/F erotica. You can write M/M/F. You can write about aliens from another planet who have tentacles, or barbed sexual organs. You can write degrading rapes. None of those things are barred from entry in the More than Magic contest, and if you write them, they’ll try to find judges who are predisposed to like your books.

But they won’t do that if you write same sex romance–even if it’s a sweet romance with no sexual contact whatsoever. No–when it comes to same sex romance, the fact that they might be able to identify judges in their chapter or outside of it who would be willing to read same sex entries and judge them fairly somehow becomes irrelevant. In that instance, the majority gets to say that those entries don’t belong.

http://www.courtneymilan.com/ramblings/2012/02/04/dont-enter-more-than-magic/

Courtney's solution? Hop on over there yourself and find out. She says it much better than I ever could. :-)

Song of Life Excerpt

2012-02-04T16:14:00.000-08:00

An Excerpt from Song of Life. Boss's orders. ;-)

Sunny left Cas sitting on the couch and retired to the kitchen to start the coffee perking. If there was one thing she’d learned about Cas over the past weeks, it was that he loved his coffee. She returned to take a seat beside him, but still she didn’t speak. She waited.

Cas looked over at her; his lips curved up in a smile. “I sang,” he said, sounding like he still couldn’t believe it.

“You did, and very well too,” Sunny responded.

“I sang,” he repeated.

“How did it feel?” she asked, curious.

“Did you see the Father’s eyes?” he asked, as if she hadn’t spoken. “That damn priest is uncanny. I’d swear his eyes were glowing. It was like he burned a hole through whatever was inside me, made an opening and it all came out. It just came out without me even thinking about it.”

“But how do you feel? Are you okay with it?”

“I’m more than okay, I feel…liberated. Sounds hokey I know, but I didn’t realize until that moment how much was pent up inside me. I feel light.” He laughed and Sunny had to smile with him. His laugh was deep, light hearted, so completely happy.

“I’m glad,” she said simply and laid her hand over his. “I’ll get your coffee. This calls for a celebration.”

He turned his hand and grasped hers, holding her in her seat. “It needs more than coffee to celebrate. How long is a courtship supposed to take anyway?”

“Well now, let me see. You took me out to dinner...”

“Three times,” he emphasized.

“A corndog at the Cornucopia doesn’t count,” she protested, trying her best not to grin.

“Okay, twice then, but snacks ought to count too.”

“All right, I’ll give you the corndog. This is a small town, not many places to eat. Now where was I? Oh yes, you’ve fed me and you did bring me flowers.”

“Mrs. McGregor’s probably sorry she met me. I think I’ve stripped her garden.”

“It’s her own fault. Where’d she hear about this courting thing anyway? Lila’s, that’s where, and she was just being nosy.”

“No, I think she was being kind. She was excited. Sunny, you don’t realize how people feel about you in this town. They want you to be happy.” He brought her hand to his lips. “Do I make you happy?”

“Good Lord, where’d you learn that? You’ve been watching too much TV.”

“Cottage doesn’t have TV. I made it up all on my own.”

He grinned and her insides did a slow melt. The green was blossoming in his eyes, a sure sign his emotions were involved. One black brow was raised, giving him a roguish look. Two dimples had popped out and his smile was so beautiful. The masculinity of his dark face with its high cheekbones was emphasized by the curls framing it, of so dark a black that they gleamed with highlights. Unthinking, she put up her free hand and brushed the curls off his forehead. He caught the hand in his and now he held both her hands, his grasp warm and strong.

“A gift, I haven’t given you a gift.”

“I don’t need gifts, Cas. You couldn’t give me anything that would mean more than…”

Her voice faded as he released her hands and removed the Celtic cross from around his neck.

“No,” she whispered.

“Yes,” he whispered back. “I’ve loved three women in my life,” he said in a louder voice, fumbling behind her neck to fasten the chain. “And two of them belong to this, or it belonged to them. However you want to look at it. I want you to have it. I love you, Sunny and right now it’s all I have to give you. Besides my heart, and I think that’s always belonged to you.”

“Oh, Cas.” She felt overwhelmed and teary. “You do know how to court a woman.”

“Good. It’s something you don’t want too much practice with.”

Sing a Little Song

2012-02-03T09:03:00.000-08:00

His name is Cas and he's been running from an abusive, sociopathic father.

Her name is Sunny and her life has been at a standstill for years.

In the town of Nevis, framed by the Blue Ridge Mountains, two people come together and must face their pasts if they wish to make a future. Will a small town accept this young drifter who has captured the widow's heart? And will the violent explosion of his past catching up with him, tear apart the only happiness he's known?

Releases on Monday.

February One

2012-01-31T16:39:00.001-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAROLYN!!!

Your friendship is a blessing.

Loves you muchly.

Ice Blue by Emma Jameson

2012-01-29T08:51:00.000-08:00

Here I go again, trying to communicate why I liked a book.

See, I'm not a picky reader. I can tolerate a lot and half the time don't even notice what seem like egregious errors to others until they're pointed out to me. And even then, I might say "For God's sake, get a life!" To myself, of course, because I'm never, ever rude in public. Never.

This book did have one whopper of an error involving blood type, but I knew what the author was going for, rearranged some letters in my head and carried on. Hopefully she'll fix it. That's the great thing about ebooks, you can fix stuff like this and have the book back to the public in no time at all.

Anyway, I love police procedurals and I especially love British police procedurals. This one has a lot to love about it.

There's a May-December 'maybe' romance between Anthony Hetheridge, ninth Baron of Wellegrave, chief superintendent for New Scotland Yard, suave and unflappable, and Detective Sargeant Kate Wakefield, determined to be equal with the males on the force, honest if brash. They both come to appreciate each other, although nothing is resolved by the end of the book, which bodes well for a sequel, I'd think. And sure enough, Blue Murder is coming out spring 2012. Yay!

The murders reminded me a bit of a Georgette Heyer mystery, only more gory. They are 'upper class' murders, with all the accompanying power maneuvers you would expect from people who routinely get their own way.

This is a book strongly driven by character. The author does not psychologically roto rooter their minds, but enough is shown to make them and their actions believeable. I liked all the main characters, with the exception of Superintendent Vic Jackson, who's a sexist pig, but I don't think I was supposed to like him. *grin*

As far as the writing is concerned, nothing tripped me up. No weirdly put together sentences, no awkward, stiff dialogue. The writing flowed, therefore the story flowed. The mystery was complicated enough to satisfy me, although I wish more had been explained about the resolution.

Nothing in the formating pulled me out of the story; it was very well done.

All in all a great deal for $2.99 and a great example of an indie done correctly by someone who can first of all write, and second of all format.

If I come across other indies I like, I'll be sure to let you know. If I did do reviews, which, as you know, I don't, I would have to give Ice Blue 4 stars.

I'm going to link to Amazon (I hope), so you can see what others have to say.
Amazon is where I live, heh. My apologies to those with other formats. :-(

http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Lord-Lady-Hetheridge-ebook/dp/B004UB0WTY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1327855328&sr=8-1

Wordage With Friends

2012-01-27T09:15:00.001-08:00

See this blog post header was a pun because Carolyn and I play Words With Friends and we also write together so we have wordage and... okay, it seemed funny when I first wrote it.

Anyway, we got our first round of edits back on Letters From Greece, our non-shitty book that comes out in July and I had it a few days and worked on it and now Carolyn has it and is working on it.

Edits are an interesting thing. Our editors, Tir, goes through and fixes the spelling and punctuation shit per House rules. We truly try to do it ourselves but the amount we miss can be astounding.

Then she sends it back and it has a million little notes on the side, most of which say "What's she thinking here?"

Now in my case, I usually write my own note that says "Isn't that apparent?" which of course it isn't because Tir wouldn't have had to ask if it was. But it gets me out of doing any work in the first round because Tir has to point out that I'm an idiot.

Carolyn, I'm sure, fixes it right up. Carolyn is a very good girl.Carolyn doesn't leave snarky notes on the side or cheat.

Which leads me to Words With Friends. My sister is hooked on the game (it's like Scrabble for the phone) so she got me playing it and then I got Carolyn playing it.

I lose a lot. I mean, I lose a whole hell of a lot. In fact, I don't know if I've ever won a game. So now I cheat. I'm a mad cheater. A crazy-ass cheater. I am a cheater extraordinaire.

I still lose but by less of a point spread.

Carolyn whoops my ass. I wonder if there's a moral to this blog post.

My Point (is not just on the top of my head)

2012-01-25T15:45:00.000-08:00

So all these blogs are doing a pile-up on some book about a soccer playing man-whore and the heroine, a black woman who's milkshake wouldn't bring the boys to the yard (gads, I love that line because it makes no sense). Anyway, what's interesting to me is the side conversation going on about inter-racial romance and how readers will accept a crappy book if it has a character of color.

Written by a woman of color, that is.

I wrote an inter-racial (IR) romance called Sugar B's Back in Town. Look at the book cover. That man is definately of color. That woman is not. Therefore: IR.

Worst selling book I got.

It's wonderfully edited, the story is good, the reviews have been fucking amazing and unlike the soccer playing man-ho, you'd be hard pressed to find misspellings or a lack of commas.

So for all those people posting that they want IR romances and will settle for a piece of shit, why does a good book like Sugar sell so badly? Is it because I'm not black, myself? (I'm also not a porn star but my heroine was.) Is it because I don't write about milky fluid coming out of sweet honey holes? (ewww, see a gyno and get that taken care of!!)

Is it because the only books anyone hears of are simply those that get this kind of publicity?

I don't get it. I'm frustrated by the folks out there saying they want IR romance yet truly aren't buying it. I think they want IR erotica, quite frankly. And I think the reason Ms. Comma-Not has sold so well is because she's an Ellora's Cave author and therefore people trust there will be bodily discharges and jutting unsheathed erections.

It's frustrating. Because I can't scream "Buy my book dammit and see if you like it!" but I want to.

Oh wait, I think I just did.

Holy Moly... My Head Just Exploded

2012-01-24T11:29:00.001-08:00

Sometimes you got to love a kerfluffle, and sometimes you don't.

So I woke up and googled myself this morning.... just kidding. I googled myself in the past and found this weird comment I made on a blog about Seb liking bananas and it was so strange out of context, I never did it again. Never googled myself again. Strange comments abound.

I've googled my book titles.

The other night I googled Hot, Hexed and Bothered and discovered two reviews I didn't know were out there. One hated the book and one liked it. What did I learn? One reader hated my book and one liked it .

I also discovered as I googled a title of Carolyn's that she was being pirated.

Anyway, there was a point to this. But I forgot what it was.

I went over to Dear Author to see if I'd left my point over there but Janet wrote a blog post about reviews that I didn't understand. It was all academic or something. I wish people would leave the smart shit at home or at work where it belongs and not put it on blogs. Smart shit makes my head hurt.

So I wandered over to Smart Bitches where thankfully they don't get too smart for me. They were having some fun and I meant to stay there for awhile but then I remembered I was on a search for the point of this blog post.

I texted Carolyn and asked What's the point? but she answered Huh? which wasn't very helpful.

So I went to google and typed in What's the point of this blog post? and it answered Transcendence which I thought was a good answer but didn't really have anything to do with book reviews.

So now I'm going to eat a brownie and try to figure out what this all means.

Cease and Desist ... Says Carolyn??

2012-01-22T08:09:00.000-08:00

Dear Lori:

It has come to my attention that we are operating illegally. Please refer to your post below, titled In Defense of Writers, which touches on the point I'm about to make.

We are writers. We are published writers. And here we are operating a blog more or less as readers. We talk about books we like and even worse, we give opinions!

Heavens, I feel faint.

I mean, I just realized I'm in conflict with myself. According to some, I have to be either one or the other: author or reader. I can't be both.

I suppose the problem is I feel more like a reader than an author. I'm easy to hide, despite my size, because very few people know my name or my books. But I am published, as are you, so I can see only one solution ...

We'll have to shut down.

Sincerely

Carolyn

~~~~~~~~~~~

My darling Carolyn,

I assume you were in your kitchen and got high from the oven fumes. Mold will do that when burned.

I'm terribly confused. Are you saying that by virtue of selling four books every month to whatever relatives we can drag out of our old Christmas Card lists (hey! Aunt Helga hasn't yet heard about my new novel!) we've lost the right to read or write?

Wait. That made no sense.

So are you suggesting that I can buy books and read them but not have opinions?

Or are you speaking specifically of this blog? So our writing about age spots and wet spots and which we prefer is no longer allowed?

I think I have to lay down. Or lie down? Now I'm even more confused.

Lori

~~~~~~~~~~

My darlin', darlin' Lori:

You know I'm speaking specifically of this blog.

Here's a 'what if':

What if we become famous, like the 'authors behaving badly'?

See, when you're famous authors, even if it's just in a limited circle, you aren't allowed to do certain stuff, like dislike a Julia Quinn book, because what if you need her to blurb you one day?

Anyway, I gather from your rather pointed reply you don't want to close the blog. Therefore I suggest you share your mother's recipe for turkey casserole and leave all the writing stuff to competent reviewers, except for your own stuff, of course, which you are expected to promote.

And despite your remarks about my oven, I remain

Yours sincerely

Carolyn

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Carolyn, my poppet,

Courtney Milan has opinions. I don't know if she has opinions about other writer's books but she has bunches of opinions and she shares them all over the damned place!

If Courtney can opine, I want to opine too.

And I take pointed offence at your suggestion that my book reviews are less than professional. They are amazingly professional. They have the book title, the author's name and my feelings about the book.

Do you mean to tell me there's more? Like do I have to have a degree in reviewing?

And that casserole recipe was not my mother's. My mother was the one who suggested that kitchens were a wonderful place to keep the menus for the take out places.

Anyway, I refuse to shut down the blog, shut my mouth or be ashamed of my reading. Goodness, I'm starting to feel like I'm on a playground and being told I can't use the slide.

I like to slide dammit!!

Your BFF,

Lori

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Listen Lori -

I'm just trying to save you from 'the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune', because you know what'll happen if some of these blogs get ahold of you, where everyone on the internet has an opinion and isn't afraid to post them. Why should they be afraid? No one knows who the hell they are, and half of them still post as 'Anonymous' or variations thereof anyway.

Well, I've always supported you in everything you've done (except that time you wanted to kidnap Carlos and keep him in my attic - although it was tempting) so I guess that means we'll continue on as usual.

I really expected a more ... um ... logical response from you, because I've seen you thank people for reviewing one of your books, which, you know, really eats into that therom that authors should be completely hands off after publication.

You rebel, you!!

Damn, I've talked myself into not being mad at you anymore.

MWAH

Carolyn

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Carolyn my bestie,

You and I make it a practice to do everything wrong so why change now? After all, we started off in fan fic and not even the right kind of fan fic. I mean, did we know there were right and wrong fan fics?

Then we went and chose to write non fan fic and we found someone who wanted to publish us. And still does! Despite our four copies a month.

And then what do we do? We start a blog together and we have no idea what we're doing. But we do it anyway. We give our opinions, we review the books we read and we plot Carlos domination.

You know what I think? I think we do it all wrong and I don't give a shit. Call me soft hearted but as long as we still enjoy it, I think we're doing it right.

Lubs ya muchly.

Lori

~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Lori:

When you're right, you're right. We've always marched to a different drummer. Why change now?

We can reassess when we're rich and famous. *snort*

Love

Carolyn

Relatively Real

2012-01-21T08:20:00.000-08:00

If you want realism in romance books, then nothing much is gonna happen. Just sayin'.

Because while Real Life can be stranger than fiction, for the most part it's relatively boring. Even historically, it would tend to be boring. The ton (which compromises 99% of the historicals written) do the same things day after day. There wouldn't be much contact with spies, women wouldn't cross dress, etc., etc.

There are, of course, exceptions to every rule and I'm sure some erudite soul could point me towards proof that such things indeed happened. But people like Lady Hester Stanhope stand out precisely because they are so different from the norm of their times.

(Btw, is ton singular or plural?)

Reality for most of us is doing the same things every day for most of our lives. Get up, go to work, come home, get supper, go to bed. It's why vacations are so coveted - something different!! Even jet setters can get bored with party after party. Always the same people, always the same thing.

And I think it's why romance fiction can be fantasical, historically incorrect, and downright outrageous sometimes and still find an audience.

Screw realism. Just entertain me and offer me a well written escape when I need it and I'm yours for life.

Oh lord, I suddenly feel the urge to read Naked in Death again.

Sister Wives

2012-01-20T17:52:00.000-08:00

I love Netflix streaming and have gotten hooked on different shows. Currently I'm watching Sister Wives and it's just fascinating.

Generally when people think of polygamous marriages, it's the icky ones where 50 year old men are marrying 15 year old girls and impregnating them. Sister Wives turns that on its ear.

Kody is the husband and he's kind of a goof. His three wives are normal women and all of age. Kody takes a 4th wife who is a grown women, divorced and with kids.

It interests me that the choice for the women in being in this marriage is not so much that they've fallen in love with Kody but that they love Kody but they want to have the large family and the other wives.

The women create a working unit of watching each other's children, taking care of each other and being best friends. There's something amazing in that.

I'm really enjoying seeing these women work around their feelings and relate to one another. They've totally got it going on.

And it makes me wonder... if the spouses are of age, why is it wrong to have a polygamous relationship?

A Little Early, but ...

2012-01-19T14:43:00.000-08:00

I'm building the anticipation. *grin*

Seems a little silly to post a pic when there it is right over there ---->
but it's de rigeur at these times to give a sample of the sample. So, I'm going to give two, the cover and the first chapter, because I'm generous that way. ;-)

I don't really know how to feel about Song of Life. It was the first book I wrote that wasn't fan fiction and so, while it's not my favorite (that would be Mariposa, due out around May), I'm proud of it and even prouder that a publishing house contracted it.

Here's the link to the first chapter, I hope you'll check it out. Some might recognize it, it was a First Page at Dear Author long ago, around 2008, I believe. It garnered about thirty critiques, including one by Shiloh Walker. *grin* It's changed a bit since then.

http://clmccullough.yolasite.com/song-of-life.php

Song of Life will be released February 6 and will be available at Lyrical Press and the usual e-sellers.

Ten Reasons Why I Loved Ten Reasons by Julia Quinn

2012-01-17T14:51:00.001-08:00

1. I just finished Ten Reasons I Love You and it was a wonderful, satisfying read from page one to page end.

2. Her hero, Seb had that adorable rake thing going on and I love adorable rakes.

3. Her heroine Annabelle wasn't brilliant or amazingly adept at mathematics or.... She was an ordinary woman who was muddling through society and falling in love but she was just a person. I liked that.

4. Her hero wrote novels (think The Perils of Pauline) with a feminine pen name. And he was successful. I loved that.

5. The villian was someone worth hating. He acted atrociously from start to finish and truly because he was just an unredeemable ass.

6. Unlike poor Miss Miranda Cheever, this plot had no mis-steps. It was laid out perfectly and never lost its footing.

7. Annabelle made her own decision at the end and was able to state it and free her own heart. It was a great scene to read.

8. The Grandmother. Now I didn't like Annabelle's grandmother and I don't think she was meant to be likeable. But at the end (the big reveal, I suppose) she was brilliant. And she was brilliant without changing character. That's hard to do and it was done so well.

9. It made me feel good. I wanted to know what happened next and I resented when I got to my bus stop or my daughter wanted attention. I wanted to finish reading.

10. Because it reminded me how much I enjoy reading Julia Quinn. Every time I see her name, for some strange reason I never remember that I've read her. But she wrote the Bridgerton books and she has a nice light touch and good romance. She never goes heavy on the sex which I appreciate. One nice sex scene is just fine, thankyouverymuch.

Highly recommend this book. It's like a great piece of chocolate when you're craving something sweet and uncomplicated.

In Defense of Writers

2012-01-13T12:31:00.000-08:00

If you're reading us then you probably found us because of someone linking to us somewhere in Romancelandia or because you like old farts or because you know us and we make you come here. Oh yes... we have our methods and we're more than willing to employ them all **evil stare**

So all the author behaving badly shits are on your radar. The recent slew of YA authors getting butt hurt because of middlin' reviews or the lack of the squee in response to every pearly nugget of wisdom they depart. Oh you know it all.

And by the way, if you haven't seen Miss Meljean Brooke's hystical Diary of an Author then check it out. OMG. She should sell it on Amazon under the Kindle Select Program (seriously, $1.70 from everyone who reads it!)

Dear Author had a wonderful post of the author/reader paradigm and what Jane said should be required reading for every author. Some of the following responses not as much (as some, very much).

Much I agreed with. I've spent many years writing and taking classes and workshops and critique doesn't bother me. I've said this before and I mean it: a thoughtful rejection outlining what you did wrong can be the greatest gift a writer receives. I've been on the lines a long time and some of my best writing has come after it was rejected.

If you can't take critique, this is the wrong business for you.

But I was bothered by the attitudes that a writer should be completely hands-off once the book is released. Don't thank people for a good review. Don't acknowledge any feedback whatsoever. In fact, one person suggested that authors shouldn't even check reviews. Once you hit send then your emotional connection is severed and whether praise or disdain greets what you do, it's none of your business.

Um... no.

I'm not going to say that writing is the hardest job ever or that my work is art or well... let me try this again. I sit down with an idea that I like and I start to write it. As I write characters appear and a plot takes shape and things happen. Sometimes when I'm writing it's like being possessed and the words are all there and it types out lickety-split and life is good.

Sometimes I can't come up with the next word and I think that I'm crap and nobody will ever want to read this and why do I bother? Sometimes I don't write for days on end because I suck and the words refuse to come unless I threaten them with creamed spinach and liver and it just doesn't feel worth it.

I can't tell you how often I decide to stop. Just not do this anymore. I don't sell that much and I'm never going to hit my goals and it's just distracting me from playing Plants Vs Zombies and getting my ass kicked by Carolyn in Words With Friends.

But at some point I finish a story. And then Carolyn and Lea read it and point out errors and give me (usually) positive feedback. And I fix the errors. And I polish it up and send it out. And then maybe someone says, "Yeah, we'd like to publish this."

And my soul dances and I'm lifted from despair and I call Carolyn and write Lea and then post it on Facebook and all is well with the world.

Then the edits start. And I discover how wonderful Carolyn and Lea are because they didn't point out that my hero was 6 foot tall in one scene and 6 foot 7 inches in the next. And commas are not supposed to be used the way I was using them. And the line editor is pointing a pitchfork at me and my hair starts to fall out in stress and then I get a cover and I'm so happy again for awhile...

And the book comes out.

Truly, the worst thing that happens is nothing. It's ignored. Nobody reviews it, nobody cares. Oh yeah, I know that feeling. Shall I tell you how many copies of Miss Hex Mex have sold? You can count it on your fingers and that's with one hand behind your back.

But maybe the book does okay. 666 Angel Lane has done okay. It sells, even a year after release. Oh, not in hundreds but every months statements show sales. And on Goodreads every now and then someone new might put it on their bookshelf.

And it got reviews. Some really good reviews. And even a not so good review. And over on Goodreads someone gave it 3 stars and no comment. (By the way, I never google myself. But I have googled the titles of my books to see if there were reviews.)

I care about how people react to the book. I created a world where the Devil has ads on the radio and War Demons become television stars. This is my imagination and I made that. I'll say it again because I'm proud of it: I made that. If someone praises the book I want to know and feel good that they got it and they liked it and I did it right. And if someone didn't like it I'm interested to know where it failed for them and if it's a flaw in my writing or my world building or maybe they just didn't like it.

Just because it's out of my hands doesn't mean I'm not still attached. I wrote it. I made it. That was my world built from my words and my imagination. The reader can react however s/he chooses (my brother loved the epitath the Demons used that now instead of cussing, he says "Clouds!") and I don't have any right to tell a person how to read or react but damn if I don't want to know.

Some folks think it's all about praise. Some say writers have no right to learn where they might have failed in a reader's experience. I say that almost every human being carries around an invisible sign that says: How am I Doing? We want to know if we're connecting and doing okay.

Writers are people too, you know.

The Secret Diaries of Miss Miranda Cheever aka: The Can't Say Those Three Little Words Trope

2012-01-11T11:27:00.000-08:00

We don't grade books here or give a number of hearts or anything like that. But I was thinking about it in regards to this book and would give it a solid B grade. The first two thirds of this book was wonderful. Maybe even the first three fourths. Then the last part went straight to bad trope-ville and ruined a great book.

Miranda is a great heroine. She's pretty without being beautiful, smart as heck and her repartee is brilliant. The hero Turner is pretty good for a hero, also a smart ass and funny and tortured. He has the great hero-angst of a previously unfaithful wife who died on the way to meet her lover.

Seriously, this book started and went going great guns. I loved all the characters and was reading this in huge gulps. I was turning into a Julia Quinn fan girl as I read. And then.... I don't know what happened.

Miranda is in love with Turner (has been since she was a child) and now he's a bitter widower who spars with Miranda and fights his feelings and it was just done so well but then ...

ALL SPOILER FROM HERE ON OUT....

Miranda and Turner do it. She gets pregnant. She runs to her grandparents in Scotland and he doesn't follow immediately but when he does she's lost the baby but he demands they get married and then they do and they're blissfully happy except he can't say "I love you" and she gets pregnant again and because he won't say the words she has issues and then gives birth and almost dies and he says the words and all is good in HappyVille.

Say what?

I mean, here was this great story with smart characters and what the fuck happened? I swear it was like Julia Quinn was writing this book and suddenly ran out of plot so she borrowed from another book. It didn't fit, it brought this wonderful story to a grinding halt and destroyed an almost perfect read.

I would recommend this book because so much of it is wonderful. Just be prepared for an ending that seems like it came from another book.

By the way: I hate the trope of the hero who can't say he loves the heroine. First of all, they're happy. They're fucking delirious with happiness. Actions speak louder than words after all and if the hero is acting like he's in love then suck it up woman and realize that words are words and the man is yours.

And a heroine on her deathbed forcing the hero to face his feelings and then say the words which rescues her from the Grim Reaper... omg, RETIRE THIS TROPE IMMEDIATELY!

Okay, I'm calm now.

Anyway, so that's my non-review of The Secret Diaries of Miss Miranda Cheever by Julia Quinn.

Congratulations to the Alabama Crimson Tide

2012-01-10T18:29:00.000-08:00

My heroes!

Monday night they won their 14th College Football National Championship by defeating LSU 21-0 in the Superdome in New Orleans.

The Tide done rolled, baybee. A great defensive game and I hope to be making a similar post next year. :-D

Woo hoo!!

Whatever Happened to !

2012-01-07T15:38:00.000-08:00

Since I acquired minimal computer skills and forged a pathway onto the internet, I've noticed a few things. The one I want to discuss today is exclamation points.

When did the definition change?

There's been a resurgance of Georgette Heyer books recently, along with the requisite number of complaints about all the exclamation points she uses. A couple of posters even asked why all her characters had to shout.

Darlin', her characters aren't shouting, they're being emphatic. That's what an exclamation point used to mean back in Heyer's day, and evidently mine too.

An exclamation point can also define a character's personality.

"She didn't." Meh

"She didn't!" Shock. Horror. Widened eyes. Perhaps hands to throat.

Lots of descriptors attached to that second dialogue when you add an exclamation point.

Ms Heyer wrote of the ton, most of whom had affected talking down to a fine art. I think it fair to say most of her exclamation points occur during dialogue, because that's how these people talked.

Then, while my back was turned, exclamation points suddenly designated shouting. Is it one those unwritten writing rules, like start with the action?

I think exlamation points and their users, in particular Ms Heyer, are getting a bum deal. Since I tend to talk in exclamation points myself, you can understand why I feel that way. And why I love Heyer so much. ;-)

Lori's Best of 2011

2012-01-05T14:31:00.001-08:00

I don't know that I have a best of list really but there were some books I really enjoyed for different reasons.

Silk Is For Seduction by Loretta Chase. I make no bones about my willingness to bear Loretta Chases' love child or even *gasp* clean her bathrooms. Yes, that's right. I'm such a Loretta Chase fan girl I would willingly clean her bathroom. I wouldn't like it but if it would free up wrting time in her life then I'm all over it.

Heart of Steel by Meljean Brook. I liked Iron Duke but I loved Heart of Steel. Archimedes Fox and Yasmeen are simply the best romance couple evah. Now I'm not offering to have Meljean's babies but I would happy bake her a cupcake and not lick the frosting off before I give it to her.

The Shop of Shades and Secrets by Colleen Gibson. I admit I have a weakness for free-spirited heroines and uptight heroes. Add a ghost, a mystery, a politician and grandparents having sex and well, it's a winner all around.

Hello Kitty Must Die by Angela Choi. I don't remember if this was a Kindle free read or a 99 center but it was awesome. I mean, mass murdering, soulless soul mates. I snorted and giggled throughout the whole damned thing.

When Beauty Tamed the Beast by Eloisa James. This book was amazing. Funny, felt, fresh. Easy to read and a pleasure to do so.

I read a lot of books I enjoyed but I don't know if I would label them best of. Some new authors hit my Kindle: Nalini Singh, Saranna DeWylde, Sally McKenzie.

What I'm always looking for is foodie romance. Or foodie books without romance. I've read The Best Food Writing of Name Your Year, Anthony Bourdain, Ruth Reichl, Gesine Bullock... Those books that talk about food with passion. That describe the art of eating.

Anyway, that's my list right now...

Carolyn's Best of 2011

2012-01-03T19:10:00.000-08:00

Everyone's doing the 'best of 2011' reads, so I thought I'd give it a try. Problem is, I can't remember when I read what and 2011 sort of zipped right on by. I've never seen a year pass so fast!

I guess this will be my 'best of within recent memory' reads and I'm almost sure to leave something out and I'll wake up at 1:00 in the morning and cry out, 'oh my God, I should have put *insert book title* on the list!' Of course, by then it'll be too late, but if I get enough left over titles, I can do another list and another post and so it'll all be good. :-)

I shall have to retire to Amazon to see when I acquired some of these books. Hold on, I'll be right back.

Good lord, I'm not even going to tell you how many pages I had to go through, because it's kind of embarrassing even though a lot of the books were freebies. That won't change my habits though. Okay, my list in the order bought:

1. The Peach Keeper, Sarah Addison Allen

2. Archangel's Kiss, Sword and Blood, Naline Singh

3. Blue Eyed Devil, Lisa Kleypas

4. Magic Slays, Fates Edge, Ilona Andrews

5. River Marked, Patricia Briggs

6. Blood Magic, and all the lupus books, Eileen Wilkes

7. Kiss of Snow, Nalini Singh

8. Dragon Bound, Thea Harrison

9. Silk is for Seduction, Loretta Chase

10. Heart of Steel, Meljean Brook

All righty, that's a rather eclectic list, isn't it? There's your paranormal, your historical, your contemporary, your fantastical and your steampunk. Plus some extra ones I snuck in. All wonderful reads, and most will have sequels, so my future enjoyment is quaranteed.

Happy reading in 2012.

Penquin is Pulling My Leg - Go On, Penquin, Tell Me Another One

2012-01-01T17:29:00.000-08:00

I was lollygagging around the internet today and checked out some of my favorite authors on Amazon to see if they had any new releases coming up, when I happened across this:

Book Bundle, Amazon

I saw the bundles before my brain took in the prices. Forty dollars, y'all, for five books.

Now - please correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't book bundles supposed to be an enticement? As in enticing the reader to invest in the series by offering a too good to pass up price? As in enticing the reader to re-invest in books s/he may already have?

The first In Death bundle, books one through five, are OLD, y'all. You might say they're backlist, except I don't think they've ever been OOP. So why the hell would I pay $40.00 damn dollars for them, expecially considering I have them all in paperback?

I thought this e-bundle and its companions, would be a great way to keep track of the books. I have every one, but they're scattered here and there throughout the house, as I pulled them out for something and didn't put them back. Plus they exceed the shelf space alloted to them. Since all the titles sound the same to me, the bundles would be a great way to keep them in order.

Alas, it is not to be. $39.99 boils down to $7.99 per book and that's just not good enough, not for this reader.

Why are these publishers so hard headed? Is it just corporate greed, or do they have some sort of agenda, a business plan for the future (one that doesn't gouge the customer so much).

I'd be interested to see how the Lady Julia Grey bundle is selling. Three books for $8.83. That's $2.94 a book. I bet they've made more sales and more money than the J D. Robb bundles.

Now, that would be an interesting comparison!

Best Of... YAY!!!

2011-12-31T22:21:00.001-08:00

http://www.sizzlinghotbooks.net/2011/12/jennifers-top-6-for-2011.html?zx=c62b1aa5588933f9

What a great end to the year. Sugar B made it on a Best Of list for 2011.

Happy New Years

2011-12-31T13:21:00.000-08:00

We don't tend to do a lot of personal posts here and for a good reason: we're old and we forget what we were going to say. But I did want to take a moment and be serious.

2011 was a hard year for me. I lost my job at the beginning of summer and began a new job at the end of summer. I'm now employed at less hours for less money and struggling hard to keep my head above water.

Some amazing things have come from this however. I discovered that I'm very serious about being successful at my life. I might not have as much money to spend but what I spend isn't wasted.

My family has been crazy supportive (and that means child, siblings and Carolyn). When people love you, they understand who you are and do their best to see you in the best light you shine in.

I'm not yet making enough money from writing to pay any bills but that is my goal. I'm hoping 2012 will bring both Carolyn and I more success as writers and as writing partners.

I especially hope 2012 brings more light and happiness for all the people who touch our lives. Each of the people out there who take the time to read the blog, interact on Facebook or Twitter, read the writing...

each person out there who touch us with the stories you write. All the amazing authors whether best selling or starting out. We're thankful for you and are looking forward to more adventures, more laughs and more sharing.

We're looking forward to a new year and new experiences with all of you.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

What's Coming Up in 2012

2011-12-29T21:31:00.000-08:00

2012 is going to be a bit busy for us Old Farts.

Carolyn has Song of Life and Mariposa coming out with Lyrical Press. Lori has The Stone Crow coming from Lyrical also. Together our not-at-all-piece-of-crap Letters From Greece is also being released by Lyrical.

We love Lyrical.

We're working on a story about hot dogs and Carolyn is still struggling with Los Defensores which might be completed by 2015.

In other plans it's my intention to fix my upstairs bathroom and learn to can. I have a desire to learn to make relishes and jams.

We enjoyed having guests this December and thank everyone who came to talk about their books. Our hope is that we can have more guests perhaps a little more spread out.

What's on your plates for 2012?

Stephanie Beck tells A Winter's Tale With Marshmallows

2011-12-27T20:40:00.000-08:00

No winter night is complete without marshmallows.

Pregnant and on the run, Mona Renalds is a werewolf with trouble nipping at her heals. She wants a new life for herself and the twins she’s carrying. Embracing the future can’t happen until she finds an alpha male strong enough to take on her former pack leader.

Chris Meyters is alpha of Haven Pack. Mild mannered and progressive, he tries to reverse the archaic methods of his pack’s previous leaders. When Mona comes into his diner requesting sanctuary, his primitive instinct to claim her nearly consumes him, but he fights himself to give her the choices she was denied in her former pack.

Surrounded by the Pennsylvania winter of snow, sledding parties and creamy cups of hot chocolate, Chris and Mona are prepared to do whatever it takes in order to maintain the domestic bliss they’ve found with each other.

Excerpt:

Chris leaned close and nuzzled the side of her face. She could feel him breathe her in, and she did the same and smiled.

“That’s not a good idea.”

Mona thought he might say that. “It’s a very good idea,” she replied. “I won’t beg, though, not for what you need to want as much as I do. A family, pups, I don’t blame you at all for hesitating. It’s a big order you weren’t expecting. And my family…well, I understand. I’m sorry I asked.”

She started to pull away, the heady feeling of lust and comfort ebbing, when she realized what it was she’d asked of him. He’d actually let her down very sweetly. The hormones and cocoa had gone to her head and made her much too loose.

Mona scooted to the edge of the counter, but before her feet touched the floor his lips were on hers, consuming them with a passion she’d never experienced. She dove right in, delving deeper into his mouth as he tried to do the same. Her belly was much too big to press as close as she wanted, but it wasn’t stopping either of them from doing their best to crawl beneath the other’s skin.

“Stop, stop,” she gasped, the willpower to pull away coming from a place she didn’t know existed. She couldn’t breathe, and more importantly, she didn’t want him guilt-tripped into something he didn’t really want.

“You don’t understand,” he growled and snuggled her hips to his erection, the heat and hardness penetrating through both of their layers of sweats. “I’m not hesitating. You don’t— I do want you. Everything feels right, but it’s not fair to you, so I’m going to let this be for now. I’m not pushing you away or saying ‘no.’ Oh, hell no. I’m just giving you time to decide what you want.”

He started to pull away, and this time she grabbed him, tugging him back until they were face-to-face. She was strong, but she also knew he allowed it. “Then no sex, no mating. But please come with me to bed.”

“And do what?” he asked suspiciously.

Her lips kicked up in a small grin. “Snuggle?”

“Snuggle?”

He sounded incredulous, and she figured it probably wasn’t the offer he usually got. But then he smiled, and she didn’t need him to speak when he lifted her in his arms, taking her weight with ease. He started for the bedroom, then doubled back to the kitchen. Mona frowned at him when he motioned to the counter with his head.

“Your cocoa, Miss Renalds.”

She smiled and, still in Chris’s arms, took the warm cup of chocolate from the counter and held it between her palms. His grin as he carried her down the hall made her think he might be anticipating some of her treat—silly wolf.

Cocoa and a snuggle. She sighed with the first complete pleasure she’d felt in much too long.

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

I have no routines or preparations...though I hate writing with a full bladder. I enjoy a cup of coffee as I write and sometimes I have trail mix, but other than that, I don't need the details.

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

I like to make notes at the very start, putting the names of the characters, where they are and the basic information about them so I can swing back and check when I need someone to look deeply into anothers *add color here* eyes. I do love a good notebook for ideas and I have waaaayy too many at the moment.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

A Winter Tale With Marshmallows combines some of my favorite things. I love Christmas--to me it is 100% magic and love. There is a strong homey feel to my character Mona. She longs for a home and family and stability and I think at Christmastime many people also feel that way. And the werewolf element--who doesn't love a werewolf story? The combination of those elements made A Winter Tale With Marshmallows a joy to write.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

While peace on earth is on my list--back off deer!--I am hoping for new curtains in my living room.

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

In A Winter Tale With Marshmallows Mona bakes. I love baking and I think it's reflected in her. I have one of Mona's recipes up on my website. Mona's S'more Pancakes can be found under the Crafty Paranormals heading at www.stephaniebeck.net.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

I planned on being the president for a few years, but other than that stint, writing has always been on my mind. The best advice I can think of is to keep writing and to be patient. That sounds vague and not very helpful, but at the end of the day, it's what a writer needs to do to get where they want to be.

Lookie Here!!

2011-12-26T15:37:00.000-08:00

Lyrical Press is having a contest. Go on over and read about it. There's some great prizes being offered.

http://bit.ly/uIsB7x

And if you decide to enter = Good Luck!

I Can't Edit Lori's Stuff, so ....

2011-12-24T19:21:00.000-08:00

I've made another post. :-D

A very generous Christmas gift from Ilona Andrews:

http://www.ilona-andrews.com/magic-gifts/

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Merry Christmas Y'all

2011-12-24T16:35:00.000-08:00

Two Old Farts wish everyone a very merry Christmas. Except Justin Beiber.

Welcoming Wendy Ely and her Midnight Secrets

2011-12-23T08:23:00.000-08:00

Will Miguel’s whispered midnight promises ever see the light of day?

Content with her job as small town waitress and roll of single mom, Allison believes she's better off without a man. In her opinion, all they bring is chaos - and that includes the father of her child. So why has Miguel’s arrival shaken her so badly?

It's not easy for Allison to keep Miguel a secret with someone set on shutting down her bakery and the local sheriff believing she harbors a vendetta against the town because of her tormented past.

Keeping her secrets and clearing her name just might be harder than Allison ever imagined.

Content warning; This book contains cold family situations during the day and hot nights.

Excerpt:

She wasn’t like Christine, but that didn’t mean she would accept what he’d done. But how long would he be able to keep it from her? Each time they were together, he felt the words linger on the tip of his tongue, ready to slip out at any moment.

As he drove down Allison’s street, a nervousness settled over him. All the lights were off in the house. She always left her light on, but not tonight. He hoped she hadn’t fallen asleep. Even though he felt like a teenager again, sneaking in her house at night, he understood the issues she was facing tonight. Her mom was sick and no sitter. He’d do what he had to in order to see her.

As soon as he pulled into the driveway and flipped off the headlights, the front door opened. He climbed out, set the alarm on his car and hoped the beep didn’t wake anyone inside. She smiled at him as he ran across the yard and up the steps. His lips planted against hers.As far as he was concerned, he’d been away from her long enough.

She held the door open for him as she put her finger to her lips and said, “Shh.”

He nodded as he walked in and followed her down the hall. He peeked into a poster-covered bedroom and smiled at the sleeping teenager. “Hannah?” he whispered. Usually the doors were shut, preventing any sort of view of the kids.

She smiled back at him and stopped outside another room. “Kyle.” She pointed to her sleeping son.

She moved further down the hall, shut another bedroom door before stepping into her room. Done in creamy tones, the effectwas very girly, but he liked it. It somehow fit Allison. She seemed nervous as she folded her hands in front of her and looked at him with wide eyes. “You can sit down,” she whispered, motioning toward the bed.

Miguel sprawled out on the bed and reached for her. “Come here.”

She slowly walked over to him as he kicked off his shoes. With her hand in his, she sat by him on the bed. He pulled her down until her lips met his again, his heart pounding in his chest. He had to tell her the secret so they could move forward. The thought of telling her twirled around in his mind as he tried to focus on her tongue pressing against his.

Pulling away from him, she slid up to the pillows and under the covers. Her mouth formed into a sexy smile as she patted the bed next to her. He loved the itty bitty shorts she wore and the tight t-shirt hugging her curves. Even though the shape of her body made her a little uncomfortable, he had never seen a sexier woman in his life and if it took every day to convince her of that attraction, it would be worth it to him.

But first the secret.

He moved to her side, but leaned up on his elbow so he could look in her eyes. If she told him to go away, he would honor thatrequest, even though it would be less painful if she ripped his heart out.Taking a strand of her hair and looping it around his finger, he said,“Allison.”

“Yes.” Her gaze moved down to his lips, letting him know she was ready for another night of hot passionate lovemaking.

“I have something to tell you.” His heart pounded. His hands trembled. His heart prepared itself to break.

Interview

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

Life is so busy for me right now.I go to college full time, work, homeschool my son, and my daughter attends a performing arts high school so we are often running to performances (she does ballet and guitar). I’m also a single mom so all of the chores rest on my shoulders. What does this have to do with my writing routine? Well, when I have a free moment, I have to just flop down at the computer and write without any routine beforehand. My writing time right now is stolen time from another job.

Before life turned crazy for me, I would have a big coffee (preferably Starbucks) and put on headphones with my favorite writing music.

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

I never outline but do have a file with character information. I feel like I have to know the characters a little before starting the story. I might have pictures of people who resemble the characters a little bit but this isn’t required. I always write character profiles though. Not plotting ahead of time lets me discover the story as the reader would… a little at a time. I love the thrill of not knowing what happens next.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

I became inspired to write Midnight Secrets while I was in the middle of Confessions, the first in the series. I don’t like writing series so I had no intentions on expanding the lives of the people in Wilson, Arizona. Allison Montgomery is such a strong character that she had a hard time staying in the background. I needed to put her in her own book, to write her story. She became the main character in Midnight Secrets.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

I’d really like a Kindle. That’s right, I’m probably the only one you know who doesn’t own one. I often win books or have author friends sending me ebooks. To read them I have to sit on the computer for hours. I don’t like to do it that way. A Kindle would be so much better!

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

Coffee of some type usually appears somewhere in my books. Maybe its because I absolutely love the stuff?

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

I didn’t dream of being a writer when I grew up but I did start writing as soon as I was able to put the words together. I believe that my first attempt at a romance novel was at age 13.

My most important advice would be totake 5 minutes a day to write. Everyone has 5 minutes. Scribble the words in a notebook during a commercial of your favorite show, set the paper down on the counter and write while you are cooking... but why? Because it helps get you into the habit of writing every day. Also, often times I find myself planning on only 5 minutes and then I get sucked into the zone. I produce my best work.

An Iron Announcement

2011-12-22T06:25:00.000-08:00

We have officially decided to make Melean our official squee of 2012. Just sayin'.

Our Iron winner hasn't been decided because my name chooser is sleeping. (Others use random integer choosers, I read the names to my 10 year old and she decides. Trust me, her choices are random. We'll email the winner today, we promise.)

Wendy Ely will be joining us tomorrow and then it's Christmas. Despite the official announcements from the North Pole, we Old Farts do believe we can redeem ourselves in the next couple of days.

Meljean Brook, y'all

2011-12-19T20:31:00.000-08:00

Carolyn here - hiya.

Lori squeed herself into a muddled puddle on the floor ... okay, that sentence might be misunderstood, so let me begin again.

Lori is incapacitated due to an extremely blissful case of fangirl-itis and so it falls to me, the older (and wiser) Fart to carry on. Which, believe me is not a problem - except ... Meljean Brook might see what I'm writing here. She might notice run on sentences and comma splices and misuse of adverbs and semi-colons!

That's okay, I have some British somewhere in my ancestry, so I'll keep a stiff upper lip and carry on.

Sorry about that. As older Farts are wont to do, I tend to wander off topic a bit. But I'm back on track now.

First up, my impression of the latest in the The Iron Seas series, Heart of Steel which can be summed up in one word - SQUEEEEEEEEE. However, I'll try to be a little more succinct.

Then we're going to have a 'contrast and compare' with some bookcovers and last, but most certainly not least, a short question and answer session with noted author Meljean Brook herself, who graciously accepted Lori's pleas for an interview.

Heart of Steel

This is the story of the unusal courtship of Archimedes Fox and Yasmeen, owner and captain of the Lady Corsair airship. These two are made for each other. Yasmeen is the alpha in this book, Archimedes a beta and yet ... that's not quite right. There's so much more to him.

He does daringly foolish things and manages to pull them off and still keep himself alive. I guess it's that he doesn't have the personality of an alpha. He doesn't brood, he doesn't try to dominate Yasmeen - unless he's sure he can win.

Watching these two feint and argue, while they inevitably learn more about each other, was sheer pleasure. Yasmeen is kickass, but every act of cruelty has a valid reason behind it, one that allows her to remain captain of her airship and dominent among her peers.

I'm not going to give away any plot devices - oh no, that would be like writing a synopsis and I don't care who's doing the review, they never do it as well as the author, so you'll just have to get the book and read it.

Where was I?

Oh yes. Well, this isn't really a review anyway because you know - review/synopsis?

Okay, I suck at this. But may I just say, if you want to read a great adventure, learn more about Yasmeen's background, and hang with a couple of unusual but absolutely great characters, this is the book for you.

And despite Meljean's answer to the last interview question, she'll have to write hard and fast to top Archimedes Fox. He's at the top of my hero list. However, I have no doubt she can do it, and I can't wait for the next book.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Now then. The 'contrast and compare'.

Consider these two bookcovers:

The one on the top is the British cover of Iron Duke. Is that not Rhys??? Huh? Huh?

That is Rhys!!

I like it sooooo much better than the US cover. I always thought the guy in that picture (who CANNOT be Rhys!) needed an uplift, or at the very least a training bra. The English cover chickened out on Minna though. She doesn't look Asian enough to be the brunt of racism. But the cover itself is beautiful.

Now check out these two covers:

On the top is the German cover for Heart of Steel. Is that not Yasmeen?? What a gorgeous cover. I lust after that cover! On the right is the US cover, and I'm telling you right now, that is NOT Archimedes Fox! Where's his waistcoat? And if he were staring danger in the face, he'd be grinning like a madman (which he may be, but I love him anyway).

So far, by my count, it's Europe 2, USA 0. Really, can't US publishers get away from man titty?

Don't mean to get on a soap box here, so we shall continue on to the piece de resistance.

Here, in her own words, is Meljean Brook.

When did steampunk become a genre? Did you have an interest in it from its beginning?

The first works that we consider steampunk showed up in the seventies and eighties. Of course there were works that can be considered steampunk earlier than that (the oft-referenced Jules Verne and H.G. Wells are not steampunk, however--they wrote science fiction, not historical science fiction) and the term itself was invented in the 80s and applied to books like Morlock Night and The Anubis Gates.

Personally, I've always loved the idea of science fiction and gadgetry in a historical setting. Whether its something like A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court or Wild Wild West, there's just a wonderful sense of adventure and invention (and romance!) about the genre that appeals to me.

You have a complicated, very realistic world in The Iron Seas series. Which came first, the world building or the storyline?

The world building came first ... sort of. I'd developed the basic idea of the world before I began writing anything in it, but there are bits and pieces that I developed in response to some need from the storyline (usually something that had to be explained, or I needed a conflict -- and so I peeled away a few more layers in the world building until I had what I needed.) It's the same now, as I'm going deeper into the series. I know many things about the world and the general history, but as I move around the world, I need to develop a more specific history for each location -- those smaller, localized conflicts and issues that shape the characters' viewpoints.

You've made many people happy with your ethnic heroines. But their ethnicity was never pushed into my face (except for Min, with her experiences of racism). Was this a conscious decision?

That's a difficult question to answer -- because everything about the stories is a conscious decision, so: Yes, definitely. But if you mean: Did I set out to create ethnic heroines just to have ethnic heroines ... nah, not at all. I did want to show that the world is diverse, but above everything else, the decision was more a function of the story and the worldbuilding than anything else.

For example, Mina. The racism you mentioned is something that she faces every day -- and that racism is based on the history of England and its occupation by the Horde. So the process of showing her character was also a process of explaining the world, and so all of the little details ended up doing double duty (which, as a writer, is incredibly helpful.)

But it's not *just* that, of course. This is a world that is populated by many different races, not just the Europeans who fled to the New World, and not just the English who remained in England. It would be kind of silly to have this huge world available to me, but only use certain races to tell the story of that worldhrough. (Anyway, history has already done that.)

How are you going to top Archimedes Fox as a hero????

With vulcanologist David Kentewess in the next book, Riveted. You'll have to let me know if he does it! :-D

My best,
Meljean

I thank you, Meljean, and so does Lori - or she will when she recovers - for visiting and giving us some insight into your writing process.

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR.

To celebrate Meljean and the holidays, we'll give away a copy of Heart of Steel to a random commenter (ebook or paperback) if there are enough commenters to justify a giveaway (more than 5, basically). Otherwise, get your copy ASAP for an amazing and fun read with one of the most original heroes ever written.

Meet Autumn Piper and She's Waiting for Revenge

2011-12-17T21:19:00.000-08:00

Waiting for Revenge:

One good heartbreak deserves another.

Mandy plans to leave her husband the minute their month of counseling is over. How can she forgive his outrageous affair? It would almost be funny if the consequences weren't so harsh. They've got kids, and families with strong -- and warped -- opinions on marriage.

Her aunt thinks she should take a page from the black widow spider. Her brother's begging to avenge her broken heart, and their marriage counselor offers to play the willing victim in some payback sex.

While her clueless husband launches a campaign to win her back, Mandy meets Adam, the perfect shoulder to cry on. Will perfect justice prove just how sweet revenge can be when you wait for it?

Content Warning: Real people aren’t all good or all bad. Neither are the characters in this story. The shade of right or wrong you see may depend upon whose glasses you are looking through.

EXCERPT: (Mandy is out to lunch with her bossy big brother Mark, who—despite her best efforts--has caught wind of her marital woes)

We exchange small talk, he tells me some silly story about Jake and his little dirt bike, and we order our food. Mark gets two entrees—two!—and I know he’ll be eating whatever I don’t suck up quick from my own plate. His poor wife doubles all her recipes, just to make sure she has enough for him at every meal.

“How come Jake hasn’t been around this month?” It’s unusual, and I can’t recall being mean to the kid.

Mark looks across the table at me with his eyebrows stretching up a bit closer to his receding hairline, and I have a feeling young Ben has been confiding in his cousin. Naturally, Jake would have repeated his concerns to his dad. Naturally.

“What do you know?” All I can do is shake my head in resignation.

“That you haven’t slept in the same room with Mike since Thanksgiving, and he’s been
showerin’ you with presents the whole time. Been usin’ his dipstick to check somebody else’s oil,huh?”

It must’ve been easy to deduce. After all, I’ve never been cross with Mike for more than a few hours before this. I nod, rolling my eyes at Mark’s silly way of describing The Indiscretion.

“Want me to kick his ass?”

This makes me smile. I hadn’t thought of that before.

“Watcha gonna do about it?”

Same old question, but at least I have an answer. “Nothing till after Christmas. I agreed to go to counseling for a month. But it’s over. Know a good divorce lawyer?”

Oops, I left him wide open to tell a lawyer joke. Never mind that he once wanted to be one. Now he acts like they’re all bad.

“Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer, and an old drunk are all walking down the street when they spot a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Who gets it?” He barely pauses before delivering his punchline. “The old drunk, because all the rest are mythological.”

Mark waits for me to smile, then gives me the name of a guy he knows who is an effective lawyer. “You tell Mom yet?” He’s looking at me the same way he did when I brought home Mom’s Buick with a big ding in the fender. His eyes say what his mouth mercifully doesn’t: “Bummer, Mand. But better you than me.”

“I wasn’t really planning to tell anybody till after Christmas.”

“Kenna and I were afraid you were thinkin’ of lettin’ Mikey slide.”

“I did consider it, for a while.”

“Why the hell would you do that?” Mark doesn’t get angry often, but he’s pretty irritated right now. Usually Irritated Mark is scary enough to make people comply with his wishes.

I’ll push the envelope though, knowing he’s soft inside. “It’s my life, Mark. And it’s my right to decide who to forgive, and for what.”

He’s looking at me like I’m stupid. The glasses he put on when the server took our menus are coming off. Mark can’t see with glasses. He takes them off to drive. He takes them off to read. He doesn’t actually need them. I know this because one of my best friends works at the optometrist’s office, and she told me Mark begged the doctor—an old friend of his—to give him a prescription, so they got him the lowest one available. Mark has a bit of a complex about people thinking he’s dumb because he’s big. Wearing glasses makes him look smart, and he looks good in them, too.
But now they’re off, and he’s focusing on me, eyes narrowed in either a squint or more profound irritation than before. “That’s just plain stupid, Mandy.”

***

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

I need to disconnect from the internet, email…any type of distraction. Sometimes if I want to “get the juices flowing,” I’ll work on a jigsaw puzzle, do a sudoku, or even take a brisk walk—any of these will wake up the old brain cells and get them firing again. And I do well with music, but it needs to be in headphones, not from an “external” source like speakers.

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

In the past I’ve been a wild pantser. However… that has gotten me into trouble more than once. So now I try to at least take notes on what I’m writing, and maybe jot down ideas ahead of time if I can’t write them then.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

The first time I went to a local writers’ group meeting, someone mentioned a writing contest, with an entry deadline in two weeks. It was a week before Thanksgiving, and I had no idea what to write about, but decided to come up with something. Holidays seem fraught with emotion—good for most families, and downright awful in others. And since writing a short story presented a challenge for me (my ongoing 1st novel at that point had already capped out around 189k words), I opted for a story that would leave readers to decide the ending for themselves. The premise was this: a woman out for a walk on Thanksgiving, after in-laws had gone home, facing a decision about her marriage after she’d caught her husband fooling around the night before at a party.

While she’s out walking, she meets a man (and they have instant chemistry), who shows obvious interest in her, going so far as to confess he watches her out walking every day. Which is a little creepy and makes his character a little iffy… During this meeting, she feels drawn to him regardless, and ends up spilling her troubles to him. He asks her what she’s going to do about her marriage, but she doesn’t know yet, and leaves him wondering, along with the reader.

I won 3rd place in the writing contest.

But then…

Even though I loved leaving my readers hanging, I’d kind of gotten attached to my main character Mandy. I liked her pithy, smart-ass way of seeing things, and really wanted to see if she’d take her wayward husband back, or go for the new guy. And, being a pantser, I honestly had no idea how it’d turn out. I did know her husband wasn’t all bad, and she wasn’t perfect, and Adam (aka New Guy) wouldn’t be 100% good—because I was tired of stories with perfect lead characters and totally evil bad guys.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

The world can go crazy outside my walls, so long as I get a new Kindle Touch. LOL (I do have a Sony Reader, but the battery is about shot, and I’m tired of dinking around with cables to get books on it—and then half the time there’s some licensing issue and I have to re-download the book and then hook up the Reader again…not the most user-friendly ebook reader out there. Took a long time for me to figure out—and I know it’s not just me, because I’ve helped 2 other people who’ve gotten one and couldn’t figure it out.)

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

I kind of like to screw with readers by having my characters be both good and bad, rather than the traditional romance good-characters-are-wonderful and bad-characters-are-pure-evil cookie cutouts. Some readers are receptive to this, and others… not so much. And that’s okay with me. A happy ending is about all you can count on for sure in one of my books.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

When I was about 6, I desperately wanted to be “an artist,” which back then I figured consisted of water paints and giant canvases. Eventually I figured out my talent in that field was rather, erm, absent. By the time I was 9, if I got a creative writing project, I’d run with it. My teacher probably started thinking twice before she handed out fiction assignments, after she got that first 25-pager from me. I still didn’t really consider writing commercially though, until was an adult. An adult probably past her prime, but not interested in facing that fact. So here I am…

Words of advice for aspiring writers? As EIC at Lyrical Press (under a different code name), I’ll give you a couple hints: 1)Don’t try to make your fiction like your high school teacher wanted. Even college creative writing classes really don’t teach you how to write commercial fiction. For that, you really need to hit writing groups online. Get a few critique partners. You’ll not only learn how to write, but you’ll learn how to fix what’s wrong in writing (aka edit). Oh, and 2) Get a few critique partners. Several different people read the same piece of writing and find all different errors, plus come up with many ideas to improve it. You’ll get lots of practice with writing and revising. Plus, all those contacts will know what’s going on in the industry and keep you informed. You’ll not only learn how to write, but you’ll learn how to fix what’s wrong in writing (aka edit). Did I already say that? Since I repeated it, it must be important…

How Carolyn and I Became Published Authors Together (Another Story)

2011-12-17T08:14:00.000-08:00

We've been waiting three years to announce it.

Our novel, Letters From Greece, will be published in 2012. Ebook by Lyrical Press and paperback by Marinated Publishing.

We are beside ourselves with happiness.

Letters from Greece is the story of two women who became BFFs on the internet and really need each other as their lives start to fall apart. When things get awful, they run away from their lives to a small Greek island (called Dyvos, in honor of our writing roots) to build new lives.

The island offers them a home, community, and romance. It's told in alternating POV between the characters and it has suspence, romance and a friendship as deep as the ocean.

**excerpt**

The glare of light through the arched opening I was moving toward blinded me. My fumbling fingers finally worked the latch on the second tall gate and I stepped out into a vista of rolling hills under a hard blue sky.

There were many things I could have noticed when I could see properly again, and I did in a vague sort of way. The brilliant yellow of wildflowers sweeping in joyous swaths over the contours of the hills; a grouping of tall, thin trees, which I later learned were cypress, and which had been connected for centuries with death and burials--perhaps they guarded an ancient gravesite, or maybe one not so ancient; a white walled house perched atop the highest cliff, its red peaked roof peeking coyly through feathery green bushes.

But my eyes and interest zeroed in on the abandoned dovecote, sitting in solitary splendor only yards from my own back door. It looked like a miniature castle, or maybe a miniature high rise built by a developer who dabbled in medieval re-enactments. One of its turrets was missing, but other than that, it looked to be in pretty good shape. Instead of windows or arrow slits, there were rows of round openings. I brilliantly deduced this was how the doves got in and out. They were high up on the walls—bird high, I thought to myself, with a silent laugh.

The bottom level was smooth, whitewashed stone with no opening but a warped wooden door. It opened surprisingly easily and I entered with the intent to explore and inventory what would be needed, just as if I knew anything about keeping doves.

The acrid miasma of old bird poop, still strong and bitter from being enclosed for lord knew how many years, drove me back outside again. I took in a deep breath and sneezed.

“Bless you.”

The deep voice like to have scared me to death. I whirled around so fast I stumbled and almost fell on my ass. He grabbed my arm and held me steady until I’d found my equilibrium. Physically, at least.

“What happened?” He gently touched my eye with one finger.

I’d forgotten about my eye. It was healing well and gave me no trouble.
“Ran into a door.”

He nodded as if he understood and he probably did. “You getting over it okay?”

I nodded.

“Good. Wouldn’t want a door to ruin the rest of your life and you’re too pretty to be hiding from doors.”

I’d never been much of a one for flirting. I was serious and studious and back when I’d first met Patton, virgin as well. Living with Patton didn’t do a whole lot for my socialization skills.

The man standing before me was someone I wanted to flirt with, if I could only remember how. He didn’t tower over me like Patton, he was dark to Patton’s fairness, and he had the face of a mischievous devil. I knew right off, this man was dangerous. I also knew I didn’t give a damn. The new Min…

“Thank you.” I stole a peek at him. “I saw you yesterday—on the boat. How’s your cow doing?”

He made a prrutt sound. “She’s not mine. But old Stefan wanted to talk of his bargaining skills. That cow is quite a coup for him.”

“Are you American?” He groaned. “Get that a lot, do you?” I smiled.

“You just don’t know. I’m a Harvard grad. Between school and my mother I can talk the talk.”

“I’m Min Hudson—well I guess it’s Bennett now.”

“Nikolas Stefenopolous, just call me Nik. What’s the Min stand for?”

I flushed. I hated my given name. I’d even thought about changing it legally, but of course, it never happened. Like a lot of other things in my life, it just never happened.

“Araminta,” I said reluctantly.

“Araminta…” He sounded like he was savoring the name on his tongue. “I like it, it suits you.”

“How can you know that? You know nothing about me.”

“Then let’s just say it suits the picture you present.”

I wore an old sundress patterned with sprigs of violets. The almost constant breeze molded the skirt against my newly shaven legs. I’d put on a filmy light jacket to protect me from the sun and a straw hat I’d seen on the big ferry, decorated with ribbons and cherries, looking completely frivolous and feminine. I had to admit he had a point. I was dressed like a woman in an impressionist painting, completely useless and looking exactly like an Araminta.

I met his eyes, so dark a brown they looked black. “That’s why I go by Min. Min sounds much more in control.” I glanced at the dovecote again. “Min’s going to whip this building into shape. There’ll be doves living here again as well as goats.” I turned back to laugh at him.

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I heard about that, Daniel is a law unto himself. So, you’re going into the dove business.”

“I don’t know that it’ll be a business, it’s just something I’d like.”

“You’ve got a taverna, why not supply the food as well as cook it?”

“Surely you jest. Kate would have a fit. She’s still not over the goat in the living room.”

“Goats do better outside,” he agreed. “It’ll be interesting to see how you two ladies get on.” He paused. “I can send Tino down to make a start on cleaning this out for you. You’ll have enough to do with the house and restaurant. Consider it a housewarming gift,” he insisted when I started to shake my head. “Tino needs more to do anyway, for what I pay him.”

“Well, thank you.”

“Planning many changes to the house?”

“We haven’t planned at all. One day at time. We got here, that’s enough for now.”

“Nyla ruined it, putting in those doors, destroyed what it was, what it had been. I just hope you don’t try to modernize it too much.”

“It’ll probably stay pretty much like what you see now, only cleaner. We’re on a limited budget and the restaurant comes first. Why do you care, if you don’t mind my asking?”

He smiled and my heart skipped a beat. What the hell was this, anyway? How could I be interested in another man after what I’d been through? Not smart, Min, you’d better watch yourself.

“Old family mansion,” he said easily. “New family mansion.” He gestured to the top of the cliff and the red roof.

“Oh,” I said softly, completely understanding. “How could you bear to sell it?”

His expression tightened. “I didn’t, my father did. He’d never had much use for this island,” he added lightly, “so I browbeat him into giving it to me.”

“You own this island?”

“For my sins.”

“We pay our taxes to you?”

He laughed. “You have some interesting times ahead of you. Here, another housewarming gift. Looks like I chose wisely.” He held out the parcel that had been tucked under an arm and without waiting for me to open it, walked away, circling the house and heading down to the town.

“Nice to meet you, Araminta,” he called back over his shoulder.

How Lori and I Became Published Authors (written from a one-sided POV)

2011-12-15T18:06:00.000-08:00

How legit is fan fiction?

I've seen posts that sneer at it; I've seen posts that laud it.

What I had never done was to be involved in it - never even knew it existed. That is until I got caught up in the romance of a new singing group about seven years ago. Heard them briefly on Oprah singing Unbreak My Heart or, as they called it, Regresa Mi. I bet even Toni Braxton wouldn't have recognized her own song! Absolutely beautiful.

I set out to hunt them down. I wanted their CD.

By utilizing my miniscule computer skills, I managed to locate their official site. I lurked for quite a while; I believe I've mentioned before that I'm a shy little thing and I would never enter a conversation uninvited. Took me some time to realize internet manners are vastly different than Emily Post's. Make that vastly!

Time passed and I began to feel at home there. Sort of. Just enough to begin exploring all the different sections and the plethora of threads. Lo and behold! The official site had an entertainment section and people were writing fiction - sometimes quite risque fiction - about these very real men.

Okay, this was new and different, but was it legal? Apparently it was, because it's still there and going strong and nobody got sued.

The stories ran the gamut from purely pitiful to 'actually this is quite good'. English is not the first language for some of these authors, because the men of Il Divo have an international fan base, but everyone wanted to show their lurve.

That's how I met Lori. She wrote the neatest fan fic - The Cheeky Spaniard - and I fell in love with it and with her. Pm-ing and messaging and emails led to phone calls and a writing partnership that I treasure deeply. Even if it did lead to our piece of shit, The Bodice Rippers. ;-) We hope to make an announcement soon regarding the upward progression of our partnership efforts.

For the first time since high school I got the writing bug. And for the first time, I had someone to encourage me. Once I screwed up my nerve to actually post something, I became sort of prolific. I've written some stuff I quite like.

But it was all fan fiction. Does that automatically mean it was poor writing? Is fan fiction the red headed stepchild of literature? Is it even considered literature?

I'm trying to become more mainstream, but I'm finding it hard. Every hero I imagine seems to have bits and pieces of my original heroes and I want them all to sing, lol. I could say those four singers are holding back my progression.

But I won't, because without them, I don't think I'd be writing at all and writing has come to mean so much to me.

Y'all - I don't have degree in anything except an associate's in nursing. I'm not erudite in my posts and when writing I struggle for words whereas I used to just pull them out of a hat. Aging sucks, damn it. I don't analyze a story to death and I will maintain to my grave that good writing can overcome many character and plot defects. Get me to like your characters and care what happens to them, and you've got yourself a reader. I think Lori would agree.

So, there it is, from someone who began their writing career with fan fic and who tends to write those 'feel good' characters in her professional writing. I like to blog (sometimes) and I like to write (mostly), so I guess my question is: is there an audience for writers like us? For a not-so-deep POV and a minumum of angst. ;-)

By the way - this was our early inspiration. ♥

Ericka Scott is bringing Tidings of Fear

2011-12-15T06:14:00.000-08:00

Christmas Traditions at Ericka Scott’s House

Around the Scott household, the weekends between Thanksgiving and Christmas all seem to be jam-packed with Christmas parties and family get-togethers. Some years, we have too many to fit into two short days. Over the last couple of years, I’ve let activities crowd out some of our most memorable traditions. Not this year.
This year, we’re having a real tree which we’ll decorate to the strains of NSync’s Christmas album (it’s tradition, you know). Then, we’ll gather around the fireplace to light our Yule log and eat sugar cookies we made to distribute to the neighbors as gifts.

These cookies are, in our eyes, masterpieces. No, they aren’t those gorgeous things you see in bakery windows, but have the quirks that our family is known by. We decorate Christmas fish, only one of which is given three eyes and made especially for our friend, Jon. There are some traditional shapes, stars and Santas, but you are just as likely to find rocket ships amongst the Christmas trees, a T-Rex waiting to devour the red and green bunnies, and there is always a haunted church cookie -- complete with sugar black bats in the belfry.

Given the oddities of our family, I guess it’s no surprise to find that my holiday tales aren’t full of Christmas cheer, instead they tout titles like A Christmas Curse, which can be found in the ‘Twas a Dark and Delicious Christmas Anthology http://www.erickascott.com/books/cursed-for-christmas-in-twas-a-dark-and-delicious-christmas-anthology/ and my latest, Tidings of Fear http://www.erickascott.com/books/tidingsoffear/. I guess I enjoy making readers shiver from more than just the cold.

TIDINGS OF FEAR

A psychic, a skeptic, and a serial killer…

Psychic Lia Morgan sees portents all around her. Although estranged from her family, she joins the search for her missing sister. A simple case gets complicated fast when she discovers her sister’s plethora of secrets includes a son.
Professor Jared Trimble’s world has no room for paranormal mumbo-jumbo. When asked to consult on a case involving a series of crossword puzzles, he’s conflicted. Is he a suspect, or an investigator?

While Lia uses her physic gift and follows signs, Jared uses his wits and experience. When the two collide, passions flare and the final clue brings them both into the bull’s-eye of a serial killer’s target.

********

Excerpt

“Hello?” she called. A creak sounded from above and a trickle of discomfort slid down her spine. She pulled out her key chain, from which hung a small canister of mace. Another creak made her jump.

“Hello?” she called again. Taking a deep breath, she strode purposefully into the house and found herself in a small living room. Lia glimpsed a small alcove off to the side and expected to find a small dining area, or perhaps an attached office.
Her breath caught in her throat as she walked into another large living room and straight into the past. Positioned under the window were the couch and loveseat she remembered from growing up. A recliner sat in the corner, a newspaper already opened to the comics on the seat.

She shivered. A tall enclosed bookcase, the one that had resided in Lia’s bedroom, stood next to the window. If she stepped closer, she knew she’d recognize every title on its shelves.

A small wooden rocking chair sat next to the recliner. A Raggedy Ann doll vied for seat space with her twin, Raggedy Andy.

“Oh, God,” Lia said. The memorial to her family should have been macabre. Instead, it brought tears to her eyes. Even the antique desk her sister, Sylvie, had thrown a fit to own and then despised when computers became popular and her father wouldn’t let her buy a more functional desk had a place in the room. A smile tugged at the corner of Lia’s mouth.

She could almost hear Sylvie’s famous whine, “But, Dad…”

As memories flooded her mind, she had to blink back a sudden rush of tears. She took a step back, turned and nearly ran back to the hallway. A light dimmed and brightened in another room. Lia didn’t need to count the pulses to know there would be eight.

A short walk found her in the kitchen. The stainless steel appliances sparkled and even the floor seemed to have been freshly waxed. She wished her kitchen looked this good. A towering pile of newspapers indicated they were sisters, after all. The stack teetered on the corner of the kitchen table. All of them were opened and folded to reveal the crossword puzzle.

Had Sylvie left these here? She couldn’t remember her sister having a penchant for crosswords, but she obviously didn’t know Sylvie as well as she’d thought.
Or had someone else brought these in and put them there?

Speaking of which, where was her sister?

She headed upstairs, calling as she went. Just as empty as downstairs. And just as neat. A small blue plastic item on the floor of her sister’s office appeared to be the only thing out of place.

Lia scooped it up. A thumb drive. She went to put it on the desk when a loud creak sounded behind her. She shoved it into her pocket and fumbled for her keys.
Heavy footsteps approached up the stairs.

Lia turned as a shadow fell across the doorway.

*****

Check out the Free Reads Page on my website in December for our infamous sugar cookie recipe (it contains eggnog) and also one for a decadent chocolate Yule log (yum).

And yes, Virginia, there were once camels in California…

Ericka Scott is a multi-published, bestselling author of seductive suspense. She's written stories for as long as she can remember and reads anything under the sun (including the back of cereal boxes in a pinch). She got hooked on romantic suspense in her college days, when reading anything but a textbook was a guilty pleasure. Now, when she’s not chauffeuring children around, wishing she had a maid, or lurking at the library, she’s spinning her own web of fantasy and penning tales of seduction and suspense. She currently lives in Southern California with her husband and three children.

Get a behind the scenes look at her writing and zany family on her blog at http://erickascott.blogspot.com

She also loves friends, so come friend her at http://myspace.com/erickascott
She's also on Facebook at http://facebook.com/ericka.scott and Twitter @ErickaScott
You can find out more about her books at www.erickascott.com

Meet Silke Juppenlatz and Howl

2011-12-13T20:16:00.000-08:00

When life hands you wolves — Howl.

The alpha wolf in Zalin's pack is slowing going insane, which is tough enough to contend with, but the guy is gunning for the woman Zalin loves–the rancher's daughter who saved his hide. He's torn between taking off to avoid a confrontation with the Alpha, and sticking around to protect Lucia. Opening his heart to her is not an option– he's had enough rejection to last a lifetime.

Lucia is fascinated by the "wolf" she saved–at the time unaware he was more than a canine. Zalin seems out to save her from his Alpha, but she wants more than protection from him. When spilled family secrets make her doubt everything she knows, she turns to Zalin for stability, only to learn he's planning to leave.

Will Zalin desert the one he loves when she needs him most, or will he howl a challenge on her behalf?

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

Coffee. Must have coffee.
The headset at the ready, with music either loaded on already, or I’ll pick as I go.
I have to be alone to write. If there is someone in the room with me, I won’t put a single word down.

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

I don’t usually outline, or only very roughly. I have a trusty moleskine notebook I use for ideas when I’m away from the computer, but if I’m at the computer, I use MS OneNote. Best.Tool.Ever. I swear by it.
(Evernote is similar, and it’s free. I just had OneNote for ages, so that’s what I use.)

What was the inspiration behind this book?

I was listening to a song called “Howl” by Florence and the Machine. Well… I’d never gone for werewolves, wasn’t really into them -- and suddenly there was Zalin, screaming I write his story. I was working on something else, so ignored the incessant noise as much as I could.

Well…he won. Howl was written inside of one week, some of the longest nights ever, all the time listening to that one song… It seemed fitting to call the story “Howl” after that little marathon.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

World peace only works for Miss World candidates, and I’m not one of those. Don't get between a girl and her chocolate. If I catch reindeer nibbling on my chocolate, it'll be "Rump of Rudolf" instead of turkey for Christmas dinner. Don't go there, I'm a carnivore. :P

As for presents, I already asked Santa, and Santa (aka Paul) granted my wish (with help from my Dad).

I’m getting my Christmas and Birthday presents for the next ten years all in one go.
His name is Oscuro del Gavilán -- and he’s a dapple grey Paso Fino, (A Colombian horse, for the non-horsey people.) A very rare breed here in the UK.

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

I like to stick as close to fact as I can. The more I can make the reader identify with the animal side of a character, without feeling alienated, the better. The same applies to other stories. I have all sorts of creatures romping around in my books, and even if it’s completely off the wall, I still try and find as many “facts” about them as I can -- but wrapped up in the world I’m building so it works seamlessly in the context. Too many people bash the reader over the head by practically reciting research text, and that’s boring. I blend it in, instead.

But I like the idea of having some little identifier in every book that ties them to me, personally. I have to give this some thought.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

I wanted to be a Cowboy, or an Indian, when I grew up. (I grew up with stories about Apaches. I wanted to be one, because clearly it was very exciting. :)) Writing was just something I did because I had to. I’ve always written, always had stories bouncing around in my head. If I didn’t write them down, I’d have gone crazy. It wasn’t a case of wanting to write, it was a case of needing to, lest I go live in a padded cell. It only occurred to me very late that maybe I should try to get one published.

I have news for you: I don’t write for readers. I write because I’m telling myself a story.

Not you. Not your mother. Not your sister. Me.

I’ve been lucky that those stories appealed to the editors of two different publishing houses, as well as readers, but I have around 300 (or more) different stories on my harddrive. Most are nowhere near finished, and many will never see the light of day.

My advice to aspiring writers: Don’t use crayon on wallpaper to pen the next Great American Novel. It really annoys your parents, and it's really hard to explain why you submitted your house to read to the publisher. Trust me on this.
In all seriousness though -- the things that annoy the hell out of me as a reader are shoddy grammar, bad punctuation, misused words, spelling mistakes and repetitive phrases. It’s my absolute pet hate -- and it’ll get you nowhere with an editor or agent, either. If you can’t spell, then get someone who can to look over your work. Same goes for all the rest, like grammar and punctuation etc. Get a second opinion, a third, a fourth. Get as many as you need, and don’t dismiss advice as a load of rubbish, or as “just didn’t get it”. Because if your critique partner didn’t “get it”, then neither will a reader, or agent, or editor.

I am not a native English speaker. If I can do it, then so can those who grew up with English as a first language. To me, there is no excuse for bad spelling in the age of spell checkers.

Kicks the soap box across the room.

Sorry about that. Someone had to say it, because with the influx of bad self-published books out there, the good ones become much harder to find, and if you put out a badly edited version of your story, you’ll be building a bad name for yourself. Don’t skip the hard, or uncomfortable stuff.

Silke grew up in Germany and is used to things going bump in the night -- and it wasn't always the acrophobic cat, or someone hitting their head on a low beam on the ceiling.

She writes paranormal romance, usually at night, but these days the only thing going bump at "oh-dark-thirty" is her -- usually when she smacks into the sofa while creeping to the kitchen for another cup of coffee.

When she is not writing, she can be found on the back of her dapple gray Paso Fino, somewhere in the Surrey countryside.

Silke likes to hear from her readers.

Feel free to contact her via her blog at http://www.evilauthor.com, follow her on Twitter, look her up on Goodreads or become a friend on Facebook and G+.

Howl is available at Lyrical Press http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=3_31&products_id=349

and at Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Howl-ebook/dp/B0056IC30Q/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1323836643&sr=8-1

Woo hoo

2011-12-12T09:14:00.000-08:00

TL got a review, y'all. :-D

http://longandshortreviews.blogspot.com/2011/12/trials-and-tribulations-of-west-coast.html

Meet Michelle Flye and experience Winter Solstice

2011-12-11T19:06:00.000-08:00

Assignment from hell or love of a lifetime?

Becky Gray thought her new job in the Public Relations Office of Buncombe County Hospital would be easy, but her first assignment takes her onto the front lines of the Emergency Room. Assigned to follow sexy Dr. John Grant whose reputation as a womanizer is only matched by his skill as a physician, Becky is caught up in a whirlwind of emotion and drama. Can she find safety in the arms of a man she should despise?

Explicit sex and some graphic descriptions.

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

If I have any other tasks that I need to do on the computer, I usually do those before I start writing. Answering emails or checking in on my blog or Facebook are good examples. If I don't do those, I can't concentrate on writing and I end up stopping in the middle to take care of menial tasks.

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

I don't exactly outline, but I skip around a little. If I think of a perfect scene, I'll go ahead and write it, then I'll figure out where I think it should go in the story and make notes about the events leading up to it. Later, I go back and fill in the blanks. I do this especially if I get stuck on a scene. It helps me figure out where the scene I'm stuck on is leading.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

The actual winter solstice was my inspiration. It truly is my favorite day of the year because it's the shortest. Like my character Becky, I look forward to the winter solstice because every day afterward is longer, and it's only then that I can start looking forward to spring.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

A big book deal would be nice. Isn't that on every writer's Christmas list? But really, what I want—and what I think every writer aims for—is to find that magic something that touches readers and excites them and makes them talk about what you've written.

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

Cars. I can't write a book without a car in it. It's important to me what my characters drive, and I've always got a sports car (sometimes two) in my novels. Probably because I've always wanted one and am stuck in the SUV/minivan stage of my life.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

Yes! From the time I could string several sentences into a paragraph I wanted to write. I've got some silly/cute stories from my childhood that I enjoy pulling out to show people from time to time. My son is just starting to write stories, and he's really pretty good. Much better than I was at his age. The advice I gave him is what I would tell any aspiring writer: Write what's in you. Read what comes out of other writers, but write what's in you. And write it to please yourself, not other people. The rest will take care of itself.

Winter Solstice is available at Lyrical Press http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=3_25&products_id=414

and Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Winter-Solstice-ebook/dp/B005GX7OW8/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1323659622&sr=8-4

Visit me today!

2011-12-11T14:35:00.000-08:00

I'm a guest over at Autumn Piper's blog today.

http://piperpatter.blogspot.com/

Come say hello.

Meet Cristal Ryder and Being Ariana

2011-12-09T21:02:00.000-08:00

Is it better to get lost in your fantasy, or be found in another's?

Ellie Taylor lives her erotic dreams by masquerading herself as Ariana and visiting the Black Phantom. In this club where anything goes, she plans to perform onstage before an audience, building her sexual excitement to a fever pitch before selecting her man. But Ariana is sidetracked by a tall, blond masked maitre-d. He captivates her and all thoughts of performing are forgotten. He's every bit as domineering as Ariana and pushes her to her sexual limit. Their true identities concealed, they set out to use each other for pleasure--no risk of entanglement or commitment...but that may prove easier said than done.

Warning - Explicit sex/language, domination, bondage and kink.

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

- What a neat question. I hadn't really considered this before but based on my last few weeks of chaos I think you have to be in the right 'mind set' to write. I do a lot of thinking before I sit down and write. I flesh things out in my mind first. I also, let the people around me know what my plans are and how long it should take. That way when I 'go under' they know for how long and leave me alone :)

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

- I'm a pantser so don't outline on paper. I've tried to outline but it doesn't work. Ideas and scenes constantly barrage me and to keep them in some kind of order, I email them to myself and create a titled folder for each one in an idea file.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

- Being Ariana actually started out with a celtic/druid/witch slant, but about five pages in I realized it wasn't going to fly and it morphed into the story of Ellie/Ariana. It was actually Eyes Wide Shut that inspired the story after I dropped the original idea.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

- If I told you what I really really want, then I might jinx it ;) But at the top of my list this Christmas is to spend some quality time with my elderly parents and my two sons, all of us together.

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

- Interesting! I don't really know. I think I bring one specific convo between the h/h when I'm writing hot - the reader will have to figure it out :) and a bottle of Cristal champagne tends to show up now and then.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

- I'm not sure I wanted to BE a writer, but I wrote stuff constantly probably not understanding the *be writer* part until I was in my twenties. I hand wrote my first manuscript (yes before computers and typewriters were too expensive) and wanted to sell to Harlequin. I even went so far as to get their guidelines. I can still see them in my mind today...photocopied sheets of paper and some were crooked on the page! Those guildelines scared the crap out of me and I stopped writing. Thanks Harlequin! I could have been pubbed 25 years ago! LOL

Advice to aspriing writers - keep at it.Plod through, enjoy and let yourself escape into the story you want to tell. Learn, be a sponge and suck it all up. If you want it bad enough you'll make it happen.

Available at Lyrical Press: http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=2_12&products_id=417

And at Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Being-Ariana-ebook/dp/B005GX7S2O/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1323493852&sr=8-2

Introducing L.K. Below and Stalking Shade

2011-12-07T20:01:00.000-08:00

STALKING SHADE by L.K. Below
www.lbelow.net

Blurb:

When the leader of Lori's secret organization goes missing, her life starts to fall apart.

Lori is a member of the Order, a secret organization with an invincible leader, or so she believes--until he disappears. Their mission is all about protecting him, the Spenta Michos, and the Order degenerates into chaos once he's gone.

Lori is determined to find him, with or without the support of the other members. But a madman shadows her every move,and she can barely keep herself out of the growing pile of victims. To make matters worse, she has to deal with a persistent faux-vampire who seems to think she's meant for him.

How can she save the leader of her religion when she can barely protect herself?

Buy it or read an excerpt at http://bit.ly/StalkingShade.

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

LK: I'm always "prepping". When I get an idea, I'm constantly playing and replaying the next scenes in my head. I usually perfect the blurb before starting, and oftentimes the query letter too (even if I'm not sure where I'm sending it). When there's world building to be done, I spend many fun-filled days immersed in the world, writing a manual of sorts on every last detail. To be honest, I enjoy world building far too much... I have many worlds without stories.

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

LK: I tend not to outline. But at the same time, my mind is lightyears ahead of my fingers, so often I'll jot down short-form notes about upcoming scenes or witty dialogue. When I start a book, I don't like to confine myself by laying out an outline. I usually have a rough idea in mind of where the story is going, but I want to be free to move it in another direction if I feel it works better. For new worlds, I like to create manuals or "companions" sometimes with maps. If I get in the mood, I sometimes draw, paint, or photoshop a mock cover for the book.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

LK: This book I wrote in 2007, when I was 17 and still in high school. It was my contribution to a shared-world project with my school writer's club. Lori stuck with me even after, and I decided to turn the one book into three and add a bit of a better conclusion to it, even if it meant bending some of the rules we'd laid down in the club.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa forthis year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

LK: Books, books, and more books. I'm a total bookworm.

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudestones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of herchildhood.)

LK: Each book is different. In Stalking Shade, the Spenta Michos is actually a cameo of my high school English Teacher. He switched schools that year and we thought it would be fun to have him "disappear" in a novel and have each character try to look for him. The idiosyncrasies mentioned in the story (for instance, writing in a little gold book) are true.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up? Any words of advice toaspiring writers?

LK: I always wrote, but never considered it as a career option until after high school, when I found myself without enough money to go to university and started submitting projects. My words of advice to aspiring writers is this: don't give up. There are plenty of discouragements along the road to publication, but if that's truly what you want, don't let any of them stand in your way. Brush yourself off and try again.

Thanks for having me, Lori!

**Stalking Shade is available at Lyrical Press

http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=1_22&products_id=427

and Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Stalking-Shade-ebook/dp/B005QRPW78/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1323317400&sr=8-1

The Gift

2011-12-06T02:40:00.001-08:00

Dave is a man on the edge. He’s still in love with his ex, he’s trying to stay on top of his career and he has a secret love of the darker sides of sexual experience. As he’s trying to get his life where he wants it, Dave discovers a subculture of men looking to catch the AIDs virus and be given The Gift.

As his boyfriend Jimmy is willing to try again, others offer another type of experience that calls to his darker side. Dave is a man on a mission but the results might not be what anyone is expecting.

Excerpt (this is very explicit):

For a moment, I’m afraid I might throw up. I shouldn’t have taken the pills my host offered but when one attends an orgy, it’s impolite to abstain. And abstinence is not one of the virtues in which I’ve ever indulged.

Truth be told, virtue and I haven’t been on a first name basis in years. Maybe if I’d been a little more open to it I wouldn’t be on my knees in the living room of this tract house with my hand up some guy’s ass.

He’s a pretty boy with a long blond ponytail that swings over his shoulder and grazes the barbell in his nipple. His ass is lovely and shiny from the lube. It takes a lot of lube to make this work.

My partner grunts as I flex my fingers. I want to pump my hand in and out but I don’t think he’s ready. Not many men can take that kind of pressure. My own erection is at a semi-hard place. The pills are making my head fuzzy and my chest feels tight. I don’t want to get sick here. I don’t want to be an overdose on this stained carpet, remembered as the dead guy with shit on his hand and a limp dick.

Our host is bent over a chair getting fucked by a bald, black man. I wonder what it was that he gave me. I hope he knows so he can tell the paramedics.

“Oh God. God.” My blond boy is starting to move, a small thrust and my dick stirs. This is what I like. He’s getting used to the feeling and soon we’ll be pumping together. I hope he can restrain blowing my hand out of his ass. It’s hard to explain a sprained wrist because a neophyte couldn’t control his ass muscles when he blew.

I can’t remember the name of the guy who owns this house but he’s totally getting fucked by the black guy. I should concentrate on my blond but I love watching the muscles bunch in the other man’s thighs. He looks a little like Jimmy in his sweet dark skin, the black hair collecting droplets of sweat.

No, I promised myself I wouldn’t bring thoughts of Jimmy to this party. This is about me. Tonight is my taking this little boy on his knees and blowing his mind. After this party, this sweet little boy will never be the same. My hand will always be imprinted in his mind.

My dick is thick with blood and heat and this boy’s submission. I rotate my wrist just a little and his groan is music.

This is the life.

Available at Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/The-Gift-ebook/dp/B006HWXLJW/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1323168198&sr=1-1Available at All Romance ebooks: http://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-thegift-651770-145.html
Available at Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/110863
Available at Barnes & Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-gift-lori-green/1107870364?ean=2940013455184&itm=1&usri=the+gift+lori+green

Meet Diane Escalera

2011-12-04T15:30:00.000-08:00

Dangerous Desire

Sienna Diaz is desperate to find her missing beagle, no matter what it costs. She hires Cruz Santino, the best—and hottest—in the business. He’s an ex cop, dangerous on many levels, which comes in handy when all evidence indicates her beloved pet was snatched to use in a dogfighting ring.

Cruz will do whatever it takes to find Sienna’s lost pet, but he also wants results from the smokin’ hot attraction between them—and he isn’t above breaking his own hands-off-clients rule to get there. However, until he brings her beloved beagle home safely, he won’t have Sienna's undivided attention...and affection.

Diane's book is available at Lyrical Press http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=3_25&products_id=357 and Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Dangerous-Desire-ebook/dp/B005CII926/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1323041802&sr=1-1

We also asked Diane a few questions...

Writing is like the perfect solitary sport. I believe that writers, like athletes, need to be prepped and ready before they can write. What are your routines/preparations before you sit down to write?

I like to wake up early because I appreciate quiet time. It’s when I get the most done. Once I’m off the internet, I’ll plan out my day. After breakfast, I try to get in a good workout (Yep. I actually enjoy exercise). Then it’s time to get to work. Oh, and I play with my cute little dachshund every chance I get!

Do you have habits as a writer? Always outlining? Never outlining? Keep a notebook with character information?

While I’m more of a pantser, I do need to have a few things in place such as a working title, my main characters, and the premise of the story. I like to have an idea where I’m going, but I’m never sure how I’m going to get there until I start writing.

What was the inspiration behind this book?

When I set out to write Dangerous Desire, I wanted to do something different, a little more edgy than my previous books. I chose to make the hero a pet detective (No. He’s nothing like Ace Ventura!) because frankly, I hadn’t seen many tough guys with this profession. A love for animals softened his hard exterior. I found it attractive, and thought my heroine would too.

I knew who my hero was. How would he utilize his special skills? While I was brainstorming ideas, pro football player Michael Vick’s dogfighting scandal made headlines. Believe it or not, it spurred the plot for Dangerous Desire.

I’m an animal lover, and I had strong feelings about dogfighting. Still, the story called out to me. I like to write about real life issues. Bad things happen, and I try not to shy away from something just because it might be unpopular.

But I digress… After all, Dangerous Desire is a sizzling hot romance! It’s a story about a second chance at love. The road to a happy ending may have some bumps along the way. It doesn’t stop us from trying to reach our destination.

Being that we’re now in full-out holiday mode, what would you like to ask Santa for this year? (And if you say world peace, we’re allowing the reindeer to eat your chocolate).

I just relocated to North Carolina. What I really want for Christmas is a house!

What would a reader discover in your book that excites you? (Such as, I always have characters based on us old farts but usually they’re the strangest or crudest ones. Carolyn usually includes a dinosaur or two as a small memento of her childhood.)

I try to create characters that everyone can relate to, people I’d want to hang out with in real life. It’s about character, integrity, compassion and heart. Oh, and a sense of humor! Nothing beats a good laugh.

Did you always dream of being a writer when you grew up?

Unlike most authors, I didn’t know I was destined to write. In fact, I worked in banking for several years, but deep down knew that it wasn’t my dream job. At the young age of thirty-five, my sister died of an illness. I realized the same thing could happen to me. There are no guarantees. I couldn’t waste another moment doing something I didn’t love. Writing was one of my greatest joys when I was growing up. I decided to enroll in an intensive course where I learned everything I could about the craft. It didn’t take long before I left the bank to pursue a writing career.

Any words of advice to aspiring writers?

Keep writing no matter what anyone tells you. Write from your heart. Believe in yourself!

Happy Holidays! And thank you, Lori, for the awesome opportunity.

Please visit DianeEscalera.com to learn more about my sexy tales. I love to interact with readers! “Like” my fan page on Facebook.com/DianeEscaleraOfficial. Follow me on Twitter.com/DianeEscalera.

** small note, you all know how bad we Farts are with links so apologies for the shape of them.

The Darwith Trilogy: Time of the Dark by Barbara Hambly

2011-12-03T19:55:00.000-08:00

I've been in love for Barbara Hambly for years - make that decades, I just looked at the publishing date on my bought-brand-new-in-a-local-store-when-my-town-had-a-bookstore.

It was 1982.

That book was Time of the Dark and to say I haunted the store for the next book in the series is an understatement.

Here's the back cover blurb (it's a long one):

Night after night, Gil found herself dreaming of an impossible city where alien horrors swarmed from underground lairs of darkness to destroy mankind and all the works of men. But when the wizard Ingold Inglorian crossed the Void to ask sanctuary for the last Prince of Dar, she learned her dreams had been true visions of a strange reality.

On Ingold's world, the monstrous Dark had been mere legends for 3,000 years. But now, for unknown reasons, they were ravening savagely across the land and there was no escape from their foul powers and insatiable hungers.

Attempting to help Ingold, Gil and Rudy, a young drifter, were drawn into the nightmare world of the Dark. There they had to remain - unless they could solve the mystery of the Dark.

Then, before they could realize their fate, the Dark struck!

Okay, we all know I suck at reviews, so may I just say this is a book I highly recommend. The fact that it's over 20 years old doesn't detract from it in the slightest.

It's not exactly a romance, although there are romantic elements, one of them completely unexpected. I must warn you though, that the character arcs and the resolution of the danger of the Dark takes three books: Time of the Dark, The Walls of Air and Keep of Dare.

Hambly is a brilliant writer and a great storyteller. The reader is there in the places she describes, freezing to death with the characters, experiencing what they experience. I think this might have been the first fantasy I read after the Ring trilogy, and it impressed the hell out of me. It's not high fantasy, but it's much easier reading than the Rings and it's much easier to relate to the characters.

Gil is from our world, a student of medieval history. She's not beautiful. She's skinny and brusque and generally distrustful, but she trusts Ingold.

This is a section from when Ingold tells Gil and Rudy he can't take them back to their world at this time:

"Not for some months," the wizard said.

Her breath leaked out again, the slow release of it easing nothing. "Okay." she rose to go.

His hand closed over her wrist like a snake striking. "Sit down," he said softly. She tried to pull her arm away without replying, but his hand was very strong. "Please." She turned back, cold and angry; then looking down she saw something in his blue eyes that she'd never expected to see - that he was hurt by her anger. It shook her to the heart. "Please, Gil."

She stood apart fromn him for a moment, drawn back to the length of her arm. His fingers were locked around her wrist as if he feared that if he released her, he might never see her again. And maybe, Gil thought, he'd be right. She saw again the vision of her delirium: warm, bright images of some other life, another world, friends and the scholarship she had hoped to make her life, distant from and guarded by some dark, terrible form that might have been the Dark and might have been Ingold; she saw projects, plans, research and relationships falling into a chasm of absence, beyond her power to repair. Rage filled her like dry,silent heat.

Behind her, Rudy said uneasily, "Months is a long time to play tag with the Dark, man."

"I'm sorry," Ingold said, but his eyes were on Gil.

Trembling with the effort, she let go of the rage. Without it to sustain her, all the tension left her body. Ingold drew her gently to sit on the bed beside him. She did not resist.

Rudy is an artist, one of those people on the outskirts of biker gangs, who customs paints bikes and cars. He discovers a new talent after he crosses the Void, despite his refusal to believe in magic.

Hambly's wizards all have one core characteristic that forms their powers - curiosity. Curiosity about how things work, from mechanical to life forms to elements - wind, fire, earth, water. They're always studying something. It's a very believable philosophy.

The Dark are a unique and very worthy antagonist. We don't ever get to really understand them - except that they're dangerous to humans.

Time of the Dark has been rereleased as an ebook.

http://www.amazon.com/Time-Dark-Darwath-Book-ebook/dp/B004TC1482/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1322969936&sr=1-1

I hope that newer generations will discover her early works, which are all fantasy, and like them as much as I do.

December is Interview Month: Introducing Elle Brown

2011-12-01T12:17:00.000-08:00

December on Old Farts is going to be featuring intervews with some new voices (and perhaps, not as new) voices of romance fiction. We have some wonderful folks coming by this month so stay tuned.

To begin, we'd like you to meet Ms. Elle Brown. Elle is the pen name of someone we know quite well around these parts (and whom Orlando Bloom might know quite well around his parts... dirty girl!!)

Elle's debut in Once Bitten, Never Shy features two sexy short stories of bad girls doing bad things and having a good time doing it.

What is your greatest inspiration for writing?

I don't think I have just one 'thing'. It might be something as simple as enjoying the plot of a movie and wanting to put my own twist on it or just seeing a picture and wanting to tell the story of that picture. It might be that I see a character in a movie and want to develop them more or in a slightly different way, or even a line in a song can conjure up ideas. I guess a lot of my ideas come from dreams (I have some doozy's, let me tell ya!) or even something that comes up in a conversation with friends. Many a time I'll be chatting with someone about nothing in particular and I will think 'hey, that might make a good story'. I have a folder full of half started good stories thanks to some such conversations.

Do you have any 'traditions' you need to follow in order to write? (Such as, I can't write unless the house is clean. Carolyn can't write without her favorite dust bunny at her feet.)

No, not really. Unless you count being in the house alone. There's just something about writing when other's are in the house that I can't do. Perhaps it's my 'fear' of them knowing that I'm writing. Especially if it's a little naughty... Oh, I just thought of one - Pippin has to be asleep at my feet, snoring away. It's kind of comforting having him there. (Note: Pippin is the hell hound who lives with Elle.)

Do you like writing the sex-ay stuff?

Can't say that I'm a fan, although I have written some. I did it initially as a dare from friends. We were never going to share outside the immediate circle of four. Then a story was shared and it kind of went from there. I'm actually more interested in the lead up to the sex-ay stuff, than the writing of the act itself - especially coming up with new and inventive ways of describing the 'icky' bits or how to put tab 1 in to slot B. It's like preferring a man in clothes to a naked man. A clothed man is like a present you get to unwrap until you see what's underneath. A nekkid man has it all hanging out for everyone to see. If that makes sense.

Are you working on anything new?

Honestly, I have a couple of things on the go but I'm not getting a sense of which needs to be finished first. I also have an almost finished rough draft of a shortish story that needs major work to clean up. My biggest problem at the moment is too many ideas and not enough will power to commit to one at a time. If I could just stop dreaming...

Any great holiday plans or traditions?

Well, lotto win pending, no major events this Christmas. Just a quiet one with the family. As to traditions, we always have a 'proper' dinner - turkey, ham, veggies, pudding etc. It may be 40C on the day but we still have a hot meal. It doesn't feel the same having prawns and salad for Christmas lunch. Still, if that lotto win kicks in, I might be able to come up and visit y'all and have my first ever White Christmas. Now, that's a great holiday plan to have!

Keanu or Orlando?

Oh, that's so unfair! Do I have to choose? I adore both and for various reasons. I'd like to say Keanu because I've been a fan of his the longest (and he looks good nekkid) but then Orlando as Legolas... Can I be greedy and keep both? Maybe that can be my wish for Santa.

See. I told you she's a bad girl! Once Bitten, Never Shy is available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble and All Romance ebooks.

An Old Fart's Lament

2011-11-30T14:23:00.000-08:00

Where on earth has the year gone?

It seems I was just getting used to using 2011 and now I have to upgrade to 2012.

And why is it that the older you get, the faster time flies? I could use a little slow motion these days and have completely stopped wishing it was the weekend on a Monday. It's just too dangerous.

Hard to believe I've lived so many years. They seem to have whipped by and my...er, imperfect seems a pc word...memory has lost most of them.

I'm entering a new life phase, that of an official Medicare card carrier. Sounds like a disease, doesn't it? Lol. But I'll keep working as long as I can because it takes me out of myself and while work can be frustrating, it also provides a lot of pleasure and the company of some good folks.

I wonder if time works for young people these days as it did for me? Summers seemed to last forever - and so did the school year until the next vacation. Good times and bad times, they never seemed to rush by.

This year is about to come to an end. I hope 2012 will cut us all some slack and maybe even slow down a bit. :-)

What Do You Want From Santa?

2011-11-26T16:41:00.000-08:00

With Thanksgiving over, now we're approaching Christmas. And when you're an Old Fart, that means buying gifts for the younger fart who shares the household.

Mollie had an extensive Christmas list and I'll admit that I spoil her rotten. Although this year there are a lot more clothes among her gifts: t-shirts and pajamas which she'll like and she also needs (especially the pj's).

But adults... well, we get used to sublimating our desires as we take care of the kids. And sometimes that just kind of sucks.

So I'm curious: what do you want this year? What's on your wish list that if Santa left under your tree, you'd squee with excitement.

I dream of a Kindle Fire or an IPad. I don't have a need for a tablet but man of man, I want one. I would also kill for a Kitchen Aid mixer, a Cuisinart food processor, a new car or a 3 carat diamond. (If you're going to dream, dream big.)

Your turn.

Mixing It Up

2011-11-25T14:08:00.000-08:00

I have craved a stand mixer for ages but the red Kitchen Aid mixer is a little *cough alot cough* out of my price range. So I got this pretty red one that you have to move the bowl yourself and scrape the sides but hell, it's red and it works and I got to make a video for Carolyn.

I do hope a wonderful Thanksgiving was had by all.

The best part, I thought, was getting the holiday decorations out. (which Blogger won't let me post any pics. Darn.)

Anyway, Carolyn, here's the vid I promised. Now I'm going to take a nap.

Thanks for the Giving

2011-11-23T06:17:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, the holiday that used to be my favorite but isn't anymore. My family is spread far and wide and I don't have any local "family" to share holidays with. So my daughter and I do it together (which is awesome in its own right) except...

my daughter doesn't eat turkey. Or stuffing. Or sweet potatoes. Or veggies. Or pie.

Get the feeling that this is not the Thanksgiving of my dreams?

I love to cook but with a picky eater, it's downright impossible. So I'm trying for a mix of traditional and non-traditional foods that might get eaten.

But I was thinking about it and thought there are so many things I'm thankful for this year. I'm thankful to be employed because being unemployed in this job market was terrifying. I'm thankful for my family, especially my brother and his wife who might live in Hawaii but shower us with so much love it makes my head spin.

I'm thankful for my BFF, writing and blogging partner Carolyn. She knows how much so I won't get goopy here.

I'm thankful for Ms. Lea who makes me laugh constantly and totally gets the humor. Couldn't ask for a better mini-me.

I'm thankful for all the folks who have stopped by this blog whether they've cmmented or not. It's nice to have a connection of any sort.

I'm thankful that we're here and we're sharing this brief time together. All of us. The world is a scary, fascinating place and it's nice to know there are others muddling through with us.

Mea Culpa

2011-11-21T16:02:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling guilty about the dearth of posts with my name under them.

But really, it shouldn't be too surprising because I live a boring life - one of those nine to five sort of gals, except I'm 6:30 to 3:30. I stagger home, look longingly at the bed, feed the man, clean dishes, clean me and hit the sack at a digustingly early hour.

On top of that, I'm really just a shy, timid, quiet little thing. (Couple of lies in that sentence, see if you can pick them out.) Really. I am. I'm one of those folks who does a lot of listening, or I did before I met Lori.

I never would have believed I could talk an hour on the phone. Sometimes even more. I never used the phone except to find out specific things like 'what time do you close?'. Now I get diarrhea of the mouth regularly.

There is nothing better than having a friend who has the same interests you do. I don't know that I'd still be writing if not for Lori. No one around here cares, not my work mates, not my husband. Don't mean for that to sound pitiful, it's just a fact. My sons do their best but wrinkle their noses at the romance label, lol.

So Lori and I talk and encourage each other and somehow we stumble along. I think we've done pretty good for two old farts and by the way, Lori, when's our new banner going to be ready? Hmmmm?

It Must Be The Holidays

2011-11-21T12:32:00.001-08:00

I've gotten emails that my credit limits at three different retailers have increased times three.

Thank God I cut up all my credit cards. And all my daughter's Christmas gifts are already bought. In fact, only a certain old fart who shall remain nameless is left on my list.

I'm thinking she might like some Miss Clairol, I Love Lucy Red to cover up those grey streaks.

Hee hee.

The Rewrite

2011-11-19T12:14:00.000-08:00

Carolyn and I have started the rewrite of Letters From Greece. We're not very far along and already it's better.

I think we have to stop fighting the editing process. Dang.

Check Your Titties At The Door...

2011-11-17T14:24:00.000-08:00

but pick them off the floor first.

So here's the thing I'll admit: since the icy hands of menopause grabbed me and has never let go, my sleep patterns changed and now I have a habit of waking up around 2 am and being up about a half hour. I've learned not to get out of bed but I also know I won't fall right back to sleep. So I usually grab my iphone and log into a couple of blogs and read what's going on.

It ain't pretty.

One of the blogs I check out is Mr. Teddy Pig. Teddy is a pretty sane voice although he can be a little reactive. He is a gay man, openly HIV+, a lover of m/m romance. And he's been furiously watching while authors of m/m romance are being outed for *gasp* not being who they say they are.

Now it gets pretty confusing from here. There is one author who claimed to be a gay man but is actually a woman who claims now to be transexual. He's been the lightening rod because he has written of his experiences as a gay man and well, he isn't one.

But there are other trans writers and adrogynous writers and writer's who claim to ride unicorns and fart rainbows. And they're being attacked/questioned/doubted about their identities by, well, apparently other authors of m/m romance.

Wait a minute. I'm sorry. What? Who died and made them the gender identity police?

And may I just state for the record that the internet is the place to find porn, viruses and people claiming to be who they aren't. I had a wonderful night a long time ago with someone who kept claiming to be Carrie Fisher. She was so pissed off that I didn't believe her but as I pointed out, Carrie Fisher would never use Princess Leia as her online name. She's much too clever for that. So shame on the faker.

By the way, I didn't insist the online CF prove who she was by showing me a picture of the abuse scars that Debbie Reynolds routinely left after burning her with cigaretttes. I'm not that kind of girl.

So I've spent the last couple of nights reading different blogs and different people with different reactions to this whole mess. I've read two writers say that they feel so harassed that they have decided to stop writing m/m romance. I've read people support the authors and people tear them down.

I was going to make a joke about Carolyn and I proving we really are old farts and therefore the saggy boobs and grey hair and all as proof. But the truth is that this really isn't funny. And I'm going to say something very serious here.

The issue the detractors claim is appropriation. A woman claiming to be a gay man is appropriating from all gay men their experience and pains. A white person claiming to be black appropriates the racist experience. My claiming to be 27 appropriaes perky breasts. (Okay, I couldn't help myself.)

Well the people out there "outing" other people are appropriating other human being's privacy. They are using high handed politically correct speech for the simple reason that they want final approval of who is allowed to write in the genre they have appropriated.

Nobody should have to answer to anyone else about their identity. To claim appropriation is to negate a person's experiences: to negate a person's existance in the life they've lived.

I saw someone on a blog comment that she was afraid to write non-white fictional characters because she didn't want to appropriate.

Oh grow the fuck up. And while you're at it, grow some balls.

Who I am and what my life is, is nobody's damn business but mine. Who I pretend to be on the big old anonymous internet is my business too. And while we're at it: this is fucking small press fiction writers you damned bottom feeders! These aren't politicians, Oprah couch sitting mega authors or even the local pastor. These are fiction writers who chose to present behind the green curtain where the steam is rising.

But but but...

Nobody reading these words I'm currently writing knows the life I've lived. Nobody knows what I've experienced, what my dreams or fantasies are or how my mind or body works. You want to look at me and see a fat, middle-aged woman with bad knees you're going to miss a hell of a lot of years of my life. Years spent fucking pretty men, years spent working in the AIDs community, years spent as a musical theater fanatic, as a rape survivor, as a single mother, as a foul mouthed bossy bitch.

You don't know me. Not really. So who the fuck has the right to define who I am?

Shit Redux

2011-11-16T06:20:00.000-08:00

We're in a quandry with our book and it's a difficult place to be.

We sent Letters From Greece out to Carina who stopped taking women's fiction and so sent it back. We sent it to Samhain who kept it for 18 weeks and then sent a form rejection letter (I personally don't believe anyone there read it).

We sent it to Musa Publishing who gave us a very unclear revise and resubmit. Unclear because the editor said the story was being told in a way that distanced the reader but since it's first person, past tense we're a little unsure how that can be fixed. And we are NOT rewriting the whole damn thing. It took us two years to get the damned thing done finally.

Sheesh.

It was so much easier with The Bodice Rippers. We knew it was shit, really funny shit but still shit, and so the rejections didn't bother us. And the rejections came with really encouraging words (people loved it but said it was unsalable) so that was easy. We self pubbed it, it sells about 5 copies a month and we're good.

But Greece is a different story. It's a stronger story, it really came from our own friendship and it isn't a romance... and it isn't shit.

Oh well. Revise and resubmit is looking like the contender right now.

Doldrums

2011-11-13T12:07:00.000-08:00

I'm in the reading doldrums. Nothing appeals to me.

Could be because I've been sick this weekend, or perhaps I should say suffering from the medicine that's supposed to cure me. Side effects can be a bitch!

Maybe I'm just all read out. I'd been on a reading binge for several weeks.

That's why it delighted me to find a review of one of Barbara Hambly's older books on DA, The Bride of the Rat God. A rather iffy title, but behind that title is a wonderful, wonderful story and it sent me on a hunt for all the books I loved in my youth. Not only Hambly, but Barbara Michaels, David Edding, Elizabeth Moon, Georgette Heyer, Nora Lofts. Can't afford to get them all at once, of course, but I'm setting up a schedule and each paycheck will see one or two added to my e-library.

I don't know what it says that these older books are what appeal to me now. I just know I get twitchy without reading material and I'm so glad that these older works are now available in e.

Happy reading, y'all.

And a Rant Rant Here, And a Rant Rant There

2011-11-10T10:23:00.000-08:00

It might not come as a surprise that I'm a major fan girl of Jane at Dear Author. Or I'm a DA fangirl with my little girl crush on Jane. Carolyn saves her girl crushing on SB Sarah and together we've been known to squee in our pants over Meljean Brook and do NOT get me started on Loretta Chase thankyouverymuch.

But I am so pissed pissed pissed off at DA right now that I cannot even calm down. (And this is like day three.)

One of the DA intillektual reviewers did a post about Small Town Romances and suggested they might be *cough cough* rape fantasies for readers.

WTF? WTH? What the diddley do wop are you talking about? Say what Willis?

I like small town romance. I even occasionally like the Christian, moralistic, small town romances. BUT, and this is a big but (like mine), I do not like them because they represent my desire to have my choices taken away and to be oppressed and barefoot and pregnant. I like them because I live in a fucking city and I like to imagine that a smaller town might be a different and enjoyable place.

Many many years ago before I even started reading romance, I read an article in a magazine written by a Southern male writer about the small town he lived in. He didn't talk about lynching the nee-grows or knocking up the town ho's or how they like to spray paint the word kike on the synagogue doors. He talked about tailgate parties and community and amazing fall nights on the beach where they'd light a bonfire and people would gather.

It sounded like something I wanted to experience. Something I could imagine on days when I felt disconnected. And when I started reading romance, one of the first series I discovered was Promise, Texas by Debbie Macomber.

I don't really read Ms. Macomber anymore because she's not my style. But back then she was and I liked the books. I liked the community she created and the HEAs for everyone. Damn.... HEAs for everyone. Isn't that nice?

Nowadays I read Jennifer Cruisie and Kristan Higgans and Sarah Addison Allan. Still small town romances and still a delight to me. Sometimes they're magical, sometimes they're ordinary. But they still have that community and people have that belonging. Belonging to a place.

I wrote a small town romance once and I intend to write more. My small town is called Apple Jack, Alabama and it's populated by a whole bunch of people. (And to the crack-head commenter on DA who suggested small town romances were read by white, racist Grandma's who dream of the good old days: I hope you choke and die on your constant stream of venom. Okay, maybe not. That's harsh. I just wish you'd stop being such a fucking huge bitch who brings out my desire to crack you over the head with my flaming cross.)

Apple Jack is where my porn actrss heroine went to live with her Aunts who are both in love with the same Hispanic man. And Sugar (my heroine) falls in love with Jerusalem Cannon, my black hero. Oh and there's a best friend who is also of color and a reporter who's hispanic too and a character who has the name of my Philipina friend and there's a character who happens to be Somalian...

What? Multi-cultural? Not Christian?

Yeah... explain to me the rape fantasy in all that, you pin headed small town romance haters.

Phew! Do I feel better after this rant? Not really. But I really wanted to say this. Oh, and we haven't even addressed the rape fantasy thing. But really, we can't. because it's one of those stupid things that people say to marginalize someone else. You! Yes you! Reader of romance. I don't like what you read so I shall mock you and say that you want to get raped and you're a racist and your ovaries are raisins.

And this was on a romance blog. Now that's the part of it that makes me the saddest.

sigh

2011-11-09T14:50:00.000-08:00

Last week my little girl had a cold that kept her out of school all week. Today I can feel myself getting sick. Dagnabit!

My nano writing has already failed. The story I was working on was depressing me too much (along with my current unmedicated depression which is depressing me) so now I'v decided to revisit Apple Jack, Alabama and the world of Sugar B. She was my 2009 nanowrimo novel and although its too late to make it my 2011 nano, I'll start writing it anyway.

I sure miss those Apple Jack folks.

The site is still undergoing a facelift. The skin we liked slowed us down too much so now we're simplified. Would love to be a little more fancy for our nice visitors but right now we feel lucky to have gotten this much done. But we shall persevere.

For all of you wondering what happened to Carolyn... she's lost in edits and galley proofs. We expect to see her soon but by that time she'll be frothing at the mouth and ready to kill editors. I love it when she's like that. Makes me look almost sane.

Almost.

Housekeeping

2011-11-06T10:19:00.000-08:00

We hope you like the new look. We're still tweaking.

Carolyn and I are getting tired maintaining author pages and this blog and all the nonsense we've been nonsensing so we're working to get this together as our everything page. Blog, links to books, excerpts and giveaways.

We'd love to know what you think. What we're missing. Is it hard to read?

And for the thousands of emails I've received inquiring about Letters From Greece... we're still waiting. Since we already facilitated the demise of publishing when we submitted our piece of shit, The Bodice Rippers, we're waiting to see what further damage we can cause.

Random

2011-11-03T06:12:00.000-07:00

1. This is nanowrimo time and oops, we're doing it again. Well I am. Carolyn said writing and life are hard enough and I'm not talking her into making it harder. So if you're na-no'ing and need a buddy: buddy me. Lori S Green. We can compare word counts and act like a couple of teenage boys: My word count is bigger than your word count. Well, my word count has bigger words than yours!

2. We might have mentioned that our 2 year epic in the making, Letters From Greece, was finally completed at the beginning of summer. We edited and sent to Carina Press. After about 14 weeks with them, they decided they were no longer taking women's lit and so we got a rejection. We also sent to Samhain who had it 17+ weeks and we inquired on the status and got a form rejection letter in response. Personally, I don't believe they even read it.

Anyway, we've submitted it two more places and fingers crossed.

3. Lori (me) is happy to announce that Lyrical Press has accepted The Stone Crow, my dark novella about Gods beating up humans, and it will be released in July.

Why so long? You need to learn to anticipate great things, *snort*

4.

A new anthology of short stories by Carolyn, myself and s. Elle Brown (you might know her around these parts as Lea, the weird Aussie chick who has the moon pie addiction). We have it available on amazon, smashwords, B&N, ARe.

5. We got our first return on The Bodice Rippers at amazon. They didn't give a reason so I don't know if it was my crap formatting or Carolyn's crap writing. (Notice how clever I did that?) Anyway, it's crap. We'd offer it free but Amazon won't let us.

6. Survivor rocks. Just sayin'.

Crazy For Crusie

2011-10-30T10:52:00.000-07:00

Lori:

I don't know if everybody has a go-to book but I do and it's Crazy For You by Jennifer Cruisie. It's a paperback copy I've had for years and one that's been read again and again.

There are lots of Cruisie's I love but this book moves beyond them all, actually moves beyond any book and is my #1 reread.

Why? I hope I can do it justice as I try to explain.

On a gloomy March afternoon, sitting in the same high school classroom she'd been sitting in for thirteen years, gritting her teeth as she told her significant other for the seventy-second time since they'd met that she'd be home at six because it was Wednesday and she was always home at six on Wednesdays, Quinn McKenzie lifted her eyes from the watercolor assignments on the desk in front of her and met her destiny.

Her destiny was a small black dog with desperate eyes, so she missed the significance at first.

And so the story begins.

Quinn is a woman in her mid-thirties who has been in a relationship with the high-school coach but not really in love with him and then a dog shows up and changes her life.

Quinn leaves the coach (he deserves it because he takes the dog to the pound after Quinn decides she wants to keep it) and she decides to start getting what she wants. And what she wants is to buy a house, to have her dog and to be in a relationship with Nick, her ex-brother in law.

Everybody in Quinn's life tries to change her mind but she fights for the life she wants. And slowly they all start to question their own lives. And the world descends into utter chaos as her mother kicks her father out, her best friend leaves her husband, her favorite student decides to date the school jock and the coach goes slowly insane ina way that's sad and scary to read.

Because it's Jennifer Cruisie there's great humor with punchy dialogue, strong women and sexy sex.

But the reason it's my #1 best book evah is because I love Quinn to pieces, I love how the coach goes crazy and goes from benign to seriously creepy and dangerous in a believable way to the end where SPOILER... Quinn beats the shit out of him in the last stand because he tries to hurt her dog.

No joke. This book has it all and does it all so brilliantly.

Even the bad girl in the book who sleeps with married men is someone that you can understand and feel sympathy for.

I read this book again today and just writing about it makes me want to dive back into the story. It's just that good.

Carolyn:

I read this book some time ago and am in the process of rereading it now. It didn't have the same effect on me as it did Lori. I think my favorite Crusie is Bet Me.

This time round, I'm struck by the writing. Everything flows. I mean, just look at that first sentence. It's a long sentence, y'all! Don't see so many of them anymore these days. And it made perfect sense, was easy to follow and told us so much about Quinn. In just one sentence.

The thing about Crusie, is that she writes likeable protagonists. They all have their flaws, but there's really nothing kickass about them. They're normal, everyday people you'd like to call friend. Even the secondary characters. Except the coach, he made my teeth ache from the beginning and I started the book thinking Quinn TSTL for staying with him so long.

But it's a real pleasure to watch Quinn's evolution and it all started with a ratty looking black dog that only she seemed to love.

I think I'm about to go on a Crusie glom. :-)

Holy Moly!

2011-10-27T14:54:00.000-07:00

I had a doctor's appointment today.

I gave up doctors several years ago for my mental health and physical comfort. I had doctors coming out the wazoo.

There was the doctor for the nether regions - and may I just say I'm sick and tired of poking my ass in the air while someone sits between my legs and pokes back.

Then there was the doctor that specialized in a small portion of the nether regions. He liked to put lights into my bladder, which neither I nor my bladder appreciated.

The eye doctor. Oh man, if you've got a child, please do encourage them to go into optometry. They'll make a killing. Most of that stuff isn't covered by insurance either and I almost fainted when I learned the cost of my new prescription lenses.

The EENT. I've learned to accept my sinuses without the intervention of the EENT. He wanted to send me for some damn expensive tests. Once I came to my senses, I cancelled them and bought some Chlortabs.

I have yet to go to the guy who wants to stick a light up my ass. Of course, I may regret this some day, but right now it's all good and I'm rocking along just fine.

Dentists. Oh geeze, need I say more?

The thing is, if you have a body part, there's a doctor that doctors only on that particular body part and even if you go to a GP, if said body part misbehaves, you can find yourself at a specialist and another doctor is added to the roll call.

When the hell am I supposed to work? Do these medical people think my boss appreciates all the time I'd have to take to keep them happy? I'm here to say he doesn't and neither do I.

Today's appointment? I'll live. ;-) Seems I'm depressed and need counciling and a mild antidepressant and lots of blood work. Even a sleep study!

*sigh*

Maybe next year when my sick time and vacation time start all over again.

I've Arrived!

2011-10-26T18:57:00.000-07:00

Yes indeedy, I done got pirated.

Got a google alert for 666 Angel Lane and I went over to check what it was and heck and hell, it was a download forum. Yup, illegal downloads.

My publisher sent me a form letter which I sent them and it came down immediately. I was so excited though. I done got robbed.

On another note: Carolyn took a look at the site and said they had pics of transgendered people having sex. Don't know how my writing fits that theme...

The Rake's Snake and His Trouser Trouble

2011-10-25T10:27:00.000-07:00

So I've discovered that if you add flour to the sauce...

Speaking of saucy, my new book The Rake's Snake and His Trouser Trouble has the sauciest hero...

*****

And the mileage I get on my Hyundai...

Speaking of mileage, the heroine in my new romance novel, The Rake's Snake and His Trouser Trouble...

Get where I'm going with this?

Carolyn and I write books. We've both had books published. We'd like people to buy our books but... we refuse to be annoying about it. Why can't other writers follow the simple rules of not promoting every fucking place they can?

When I'm reading an interesting thread on another peson's blog, its not a place where I want to jump in to promote my book. It's like pooping on their lawn. Take a crap in your own toilet and leave their lawn alone!

And by the way: if all you do on Facebook is promo yourself, I'm going to drop you. Unless you're Stephen King, you're only that successful in your own mind. Be appropriate!

I just get annoyed when I see a conversation taking place and some small fry author jumping in to mention their own bok. I'm beginning to think that it should be illegal to mention your own writing. And tacky. It's sooooo tacky.

And speaking of tacky, there's a really sticky situation that takes place in my new book The Rake's Snake and His Trouser Trouble. You should check it out.**

**no such book exists but it's a wonderful title if you want to steal it.

Oh No, They Didn't

2011-10-22T12:37:00.000-07:00

My daughter Mollie and I are hooked on a show on the WB called Vampire Diaries.

It's a teen show about a bunch of high schoolers and there's vampires, witches, werewolves and now ghosts. It's drama out the wazoo and although I'm not a drama kind of girl, I LOVELOVELOVE this show.

So one part of the show is that there's a lot of sex. Everyone is falling in love and hooking up. The main couple, Elena and Stephen, are doing sleep overs. Elena's BFF Caroline started with vampire Damon, then good guy Matt and now is with vamp/wolf hybrid Tyler.

I never thought twice about all the sex until last night when they were staring their last year of high school. WTF!!

Now the actors are all in their 20s and look it. So I probably never thought twice about the sex because they all look old enough to be hooking up (some look old enough to be parents). But on the show they were juniors in high school and sleeping around. All of them.

I was so upset. Upset with myself for not recognizing the age of the characters. Upset that there are programmers out there who think it's appropriate to have a show with high school juniors (and sophomores) sleeping around and spending the night at their lover's homes. Upset that there are parents and guardians on the show who are concerned that their kids are paranormal but don't give a damn that they're sluts.

I think we're done watching. I'm so disappointed with the show for not being clear of the character's ages. And the morals being so down the toilet. This is not what I want my daughter thinking high school is.

Ecstacy by Bella Andre Wasn't Ecstatic

2011-10-20T16:18:00.000-07:00

I don't know much about Ms. Andre but she was one of those self-pubbed authors who lit the Amazon world on fire. Ecstacy was one of the titles, I guess, that put her over the top.

Now I'll admit that I got it awhile ago as a free read and I wasn't too interested. But a few weeks ago I read one of my Kindle free reads (by Jil Myles.. a Surviver take-off whose title has currently escaped me) and I loved it so I thought good free read luck was smiling down on me.

Instead I got a badly written porn book about two porn writers who write badly written porn. I'm sure there are people who'd love this book but gads, why?

The H/h both write erotica. The hero is a successful erotic writer who's apparently good looking, rich and can't get a date. The heroine is a writer who has decided to try erotica and she's never had a man bring her pleasure.

Oh yeah, a woman who finds sex disappointing wants to write about it. Go figure.

Anyway, the hero mentors the heroine which includes giving her multiple orgasms during their first mentoring session. And then she writes about it. And everytime they get together they have sloppy sex and then she goes home and writes about it. Badly.

Don't read this book. Seriously. Badly written, lousy sex and not even decent enough to be tongue in cheek.

I give it three Mr. Yuks.

'Tis the Season

2011-10-17T04:11:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my husband made his traditional trip to Walmart. Don't get me wrong, he goes to Walmart lots of times during the year and for a variety of reasons. But October is special. October is candy shopping month.

It's become a tradition at our house. John always buys the Hallowe'en candy. Lots and lots of Hallowe'en candy.

I have my suspicions. Yes indeed, I've had them for years. I think John is using Hallowe'en to satisify his secret, hidden love for chocolate.

It sounds so metrosexual, to love chocolate, and my John is at the opposite end of metrosexual. He's nothing if not macho. He comes complete with hunting rifles and fishing lures, even if it's been awhile since he's used them.

He buys enough chocolate to sink the Lusitania. It supplies him with chocolate bliss for months after Hallowe'en. He keeps one bag of goodies by his chair and treats his candy like medicine sometimes. Take the heart pill. Follow with a piece of candy. It can last him for months!

The strange thing is, when his Hallowe'en candy is gone, then that's it for the rest of the year. He goes cold turkey until next Hallowe'en.

The trick or treaters? Screw them! Not really, they get their treats. There's plenty. Plenty, plenty, plenty! And John loves the little kids that come calling, has conversations with them and their parents, tries to guess who's behind the mask, compliments them on their costumes. John loves Hallowe'en, because he gets to play like a kid and he also gets lots and lots of chocolate.

You've heard of southern eccentrics? You've just had a peek into the life of one of them.

Seeking a Title

2011-10-14T23:09:00.000-07:00

So we have a book of six short stories. Two written by Carol, two by me and two by Lea. Lea's are more erotic... mine has one straight out erotic and one funny and Carolyn has one with a cat and one supposed to be erotic but it's amusing.

Right now our titles in contention are: HEA ANONYMOUS
RANDOM SHORTS
SHITTY WRITING BY UNKNOWN AUTHORS
SHORT, SWEET AND SEXY
IN HIS SHORTS
SHORT IS SWEET

Need some feedback, please.

Oh, Shut the Hell Up Already!

2011-10-13T12:20:00.000-07:00

Ye Gads, but I love the internet. Only on the internet can people who might be really sane. smart folks start to look like little more than babbling idiots fighting over a whole lot of nothing.

I just finshed reading the bad Sarah thread over at Smart Bitches. Bad Sarah is the Sarah who is a popular blogger, a published author, a media expert and now is in business with Jennifer Cruisie's daughter doing something that I can't be arsed to remember what it is.

Good Sarah would be the Sarah who keeps the Smart Bitches site running and doesn't look more successful than her detractors.

Oh those detractors. They do love the chance to pile on, don't they? But then, don't most? Oh there slight odor of a possible scandal and before you can say "The rake's playing with the upstairs maid again," you have a bunch of women flexing their typing fingers and frothing in anticipation of attack.

The more popular/successful you are, the crazier they get.

Sarah happens to be one of Carolyn's favorite bloggers. Can't say that I blame her. Smart, Jewish, lover of romance. Why, she'd almost be me if she didn't live in Jersey and be less successful. A lot less successful. Okay, she's nothing like me. Sheesh.

And Sarah is friends with the evil Jane from Dear Author who is smart, Asian and a lawyer which is almost like my daughter except 10 year olds rarely pass the bar. They can't even drink at the bar. And rarely can they even see over the bar. So they're not even alike either. Except they're female and Asian. (Although Mollie is Chinese and I think Jane is Korean although she might also be a Jewish woman in Jersey for all I know.)

So beyond all this rambling was a total love of watching a bunch of women act like fools because they envy Sarah her accomplishments. I mean really. She's a fucking blogger for Jehovah's sake, people, not a brain surgeon. Which isn't to say that she isn't a brain surgeon because I have no fucking idea what else she's accomplished in her life and brain surgery is a distinct possibility. Although if she were an orthopedic surgeon maybe she could check out my knees.

Carolyn told me that all that kneeling would come to no good one day.

So what's my point here? Damned if I know anymore. It might be something like nobody really knows anybody on the internet and giving a rat's ass what a couple of women bloggers do is a waste of time, emotion, and good sense. But enough about me and Carolyn...

Song of Life

2011-10-10T04:06:00.000-07:00

Got the line edits back for Song of Life late last night.

I want to bang my head against the wall. Multiple times.

I know they're making the story tighter. I know they're making me a better writer. Doesn't matter. Enough time had passed I was feeling like I'd got that puppy put to bed.

*sigh*

I just skimmed the whole file last night, but there are some big changes coming. I lay awake for quite a while trying to fit the puzzle pieces together, even got back up and opened the file again but didn't dare to start in. It was already 12:30 am and a work night.

So, here I am at 6:00 a.m, bleary eyed and longing to get at the rewrite. Instead I have to go to work. Bah!

The bones of the story are still there. The way it is told is changing. And I fucking HATE pov!!!! Also, I've been put on an adverb diet.

But I have a great cover. *grin*

Falling in Love Again

2011-10-08T20:03:00.000-07:00

Can you write romance without falling a little bit in love?

Last night I was ordering my Amazon Fresh groceries (remind me to do a blog post about the embarassment of living my life via Amazon) and I looked up and saw I could order a DVD of my favorite wrestler with my groceries. And I did.

So I got my cat food and my ketchup, I got Cupcake Royale cupcakes and corn on the cob and lettuce and croutons and Edge.

So between a playdate with Alvin and Saturday afternoon swimming, I've watched a little Edge and wrote a little romance and wondered if the feeling of bow-chicka-wow-wow is necessary for writing.

I don't know exactly. I do know that a little of that shivery feeling of lust doesn't hurt.

A Generic Blog Post Because Carolyn Threatened Me

2011-10-05T19:45:00.000-07:00

She told me if I didn't write a blog post, she'd withhold all the Spaniards.

So generic blog post.

Subject: writing.

Yes, been doing some. Unfortunately it's an angsty m/m story that has dirty sex and unrequited love.

Subject: life.

Yes, been living one. Real ups and downs. Ask me about my car adventures. Better yet don't. Not unless we both have some valium.

Subject: children.

My ten year old asked me how many men I've slept with. Seriously. She did. I told her we'd discuss that when she's much older. By that time I'll be much older and have alzheimers and therefore this conversation can be avoided.

(Between you and me: more than 20 and less than 70.)

Subject: work.

Ah, yes. New job. Small office. One doctor, one tech and me. We all have kids, we all are older than 30 and 2 of us have slept with lots of men. Just sayin'.

Subject: reviews.

Woot!! Read below. Happy dancing here.

Subject: Letters from Greece.

Ah yes. Carolyn and I wrote this novel, took us over two years to complete it. But we did. We sent it to Carina and after 3 months they've finally written us and told us they're no longer accepting women's fiction.

Thank God I don't own a flame thrower.

Okay: generic blog post done. Back to you, Red.

And Another One

2011-10-05T14:05:00.000-07:00

http://www.bittenbybooks.com/39899/666-angel-lane-by-lori-green/#comment-331178

I'd kill for a review like this. So happy for you, Lori. ♥

Check This Out, Y'all

2011-10-03T14:07:00.000-07:00

http://rosaliestanton.blogspot.com/2011/10/you-wanna-know-whos-awesome-lori-green.html?zx=85634ba724e56ea3

One day, one review, at a time, Lori. ♥

Release Day - for real!

2011-10-03T04:16:00.000-07:00

http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=81&products_id=430

My First

2011-09-30T16:46:00.000-07:00

I've heard folks complaining about info dumps and author voice, but I never really understood until I bought the Karen Chance bundle.

I'd been looking for some paranormal reads to hold me until the new Edge book comes out, and chanced across what I thought was a good deal: four books for $7.35. I'd had such a great experience with the Lady Julia Grey bundle, that I jumped at it.

Y'all, I couldn't get through the first book, titled Touch the Dark.

I don't want to seem mean spirited, but WTF??

All the reviews on the bundle were 5 stars. Should have given me a hint - ain't hindsight wonderful? I should have checked the reviews for each individual book, because there were many reviews that expressed the same problems I had.

This book should win the award for How To Infodump. Doesn't matter when, doesn't matter where. In the middle of a fight we are suddenly treated to paragraphs and pages of backstory, or the history of wards, or some such. In the middle of what should be a sexually tense seduction scene, the characters are using their mouths for talking instead of the usual occupation at such times. And I mean talking! Paragraphs of dialogue, all infodump and the conversation goes on for pages and pages.

This is where I finally asked: Why are you subjecting yourself to this? You've skimmed most of it anyway and you're having trouble keeping up with all the damn characters that keep popping up. Just let it go, Carolyn, let it go.

So now I have my first major DNF and three books I'm scared to try. Oh, I've been unable to get into some of the freebies and some of the indies, but this thing was published by Penquin. I mean, it had an editor and everything! 0_o And I've read some books with infodumps, of course I have, we all have at some time. But never in my whole life (and remember I'm an old fart soon to ignore that momentous old fart birthday) have I seen anything like this.

Booooring.

Just ... boring.

Check Out a Chapter

2011-09-28T20:07:00.000-07:00

*sneaks in*

http://clmccullough.yolasite.com/excerpt-of-trials-and-tribulations-etc.php

*sneaks out*

The Trials and Tribulations of a West Coast Southern Belle

2011-09-28T19:13:00.000-07:00

T.L. Everly.

Rafe McBride.

One is a west coast southern belle. One is part owner of a Las Vegas casino. One wears feathers and little else. One is hawt.

They're both available on Monday.

It's my birthday

2011-09-26T21:59:00.000-07:00

so buy my book.

On All Romance ebooks:
http://www.allromanceebooks.com/storeSearch.html

On Smashwords:
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/90000

On Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Miss-Hex-Chaotic-Coven-ebook/dp/B005NWRI1O/ref=pd_rhf_p_t_1

On Barnes and Noble:
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/miss-hex-mex-lori-green/1105795273

A Twofer!!

2011-09-24T15:06:00.000-07:00

I hate to put up a post the same day Lori did, but one must strike while the iron's hot (or before one forgets what one was going to post).

Enough with the 'ones'!

Just finished Fatal Destinyy by Marie Force. My impression was WTF??

This is the book that her fans helped with, planning wedding stuff and such. I have to say it was a pretty good wedding, but what happened to the rest of the book?

Everything sort of petered out.

****SPOILERS****

The guy who was scary and evil enough to force a federal prosecutor to lie and dismiss the case against him was suddenly apprehended because he was stupid enough to fire a shot at cops. All handled in less than a chapter. Sam's obsessed ex - who never succeeded in convincing me he was dangerous despite his activites - also did something stupid that landed his ass back in jail. So there goes that plot line.

What was left? Well, the wedding and the sechs before the wedding and of course the sechs after the wedding and I was sort of skimming by then and all of a sudden it was over. Book done.

Silly me, I expected ... not quite sure what I expected, but whatever it was, it wasn't there. Perhaps more PLOT? As in police stuff? Everyone's relationships are more or less hunky dory now, so maybe this is the last book.

****END SPOILER***

Btw, what is it with these titles? I can't keep the damn things straight, much less assign a storyline to them. 'Fatal' this and that - I don't know which is which. Have the same problem with the Magic books, much as it grieves me to say it. I hate this trend.

Ah well, I'm sure younger minds and better memories than mine have no problem. It's just sort of embarrassing to have to go to Amazon to find out which book you've read and which book you want to read.

*Sigh*

What I've Read

2011-09-24T12:12:00.000-07:00

Carolyn is doing a lot of reading and she makes me feel like a really slow, slodgy reader sometimes. That woman reads like its air and she needs it to survive. I used to read like that but its been a long time since I've been so compelled.

Recently I've had the pleasure of reading some good books. The first one was Angel's Blood by Nalini Singh. It's the first of the Guardian series and it was damned good. She can write a fast paced book and I enjoyed the characters and situations a lot.

The one problem I had with the book was that I didn't understand the attraction between the H/h at all. It was such a power/survival struggle between them that I couldn't completely accept the attraction. Maybe its just me but if there was another being that annoyed me, scared me and pissed me off that much (while threatening the safety of everyone I loved), I just don't think I'd be motivated to get nekkid with him.

I plan to read the rest of the series but I'm not crazy about it. The writing was good enough that I want to read more, not the coupling.

The other book I just finished was Betting Hearts by Dee Tonorio. I saw it on Karen Knows Best and she just loved it. I decided to try it thinking that it was erotic romance which is not one of my favorites.

It wasn't erotica, I'm happy to say and it was a good read. I enjoyed the heroine a lot and really loved the hero because he was a neurotic mess. Only someone who knew him as well as the heroine could love him. I really enjoyed that. And I like the Cinderella aspect of the story.

Next? I'm going to be reading something paranormal and humorous. I have some HP Mallory books to try.

What are you reading?

An Attractive Woman is a Danger to a Christian Man?

2011-09-21T21:14:00.000-07:00

I am a Survivor fanatic. Nay, a Survivor freak. And I am so amazed and pissed and amazed at what I saw tonight.

So there's this little weasel on the blue team who happens to be Russell's nephew. If you're a Survivor fan then you know Russell was the most manipulative, evil and interesting player to ever be on the show. The nephew is just a good ol' boy who's hiding his relationship to Russell and praying (amen bruddah!) and being a general uninteresting guy.

Interestingly, the women on this team are not the usual hot babes except for one. And the one there is a good athlete and gets along well with the rest and has no issues. But when tribe has to vote out a player, nephew wants her voted out because she's attractive and she looks like she's slept with a lot of men.

Wait. Let me repeat that.

She looks like she slept with a lot of men.

Yeah, that's what he said.

Then he goes on to say that he's married and she's pretty and therefore she's a temptation he doesn't want to even have in his view. Like she'd even give the nephew troll the time of day. Oh no, he has a boner and therefore she's a freaking Jezebel. And she must be voted out because he can't deal with an attractive woman who looks like she slept with a lot of men.

I'm gobsmacked. Amazed. Pissed off.

So an attractive woman by virtue of being pretty must therefore also have lots of sexual experience. And a troll with an ugly tattoo and an uglier heart is more virtuous because he'd rid the iediate vicinity of the supposed whore. And he calls himself a devout Christian.

This really got to me. I hope the weasel gets voted out quickly. And I hope the pretty woman tells him that she'd never give him the time of day.

And who she has and hasn't slept with is not important to the game. Or to anyone except her.

What a freaking asshole. He makes his uncle look good.

Miss Hex Mex

2011-09-21T06:23:00.000-07:00

Introducing...

MISS HEX MEX

By our own Old Fart (the short old fart)

When cupcake baker/witch Leah Martina makes a wish, unexpected results occur.

Leah wants to expand her cupcakes into company catering but a series of rejections has her frustrated and wanting to change her luck. A simple spell amid a myriad of spices and the results are sexy, French and not what she expected.

This is a short story with spicy adult content.

http://www.amazon.com/Miss-Hex-Chaotic-Coven-ebook/dp/B005NWRI1O/ref=pd_rhf_p_t_2

Available at Amazon, B&N, Smashwords and All Romance ebooks.

Regurgitating the Words

2011-09-20T06:44:00.000-07:00

Over at Dear Author there was a review of a book that apparently was a complete rip-off of a better book. She didn't just rip off the basic plot but apparently ripped off the scenes and little instances in the original.

Some commenters said that they were always nervous because they've read so much romance that their original ideas might be, in fact, not original at all.

Le sigh.

Years and years and years ago when I was dewy eyed and randomly lustful, I took a creative writing class with a babealicious teacher. And by happenstance, he and I ended up having dinner one night and discussing getting published. His advice to me, in talking about writing Harlequins, was to copy one word for word. Just type what someone had already written and then do it again.

His point was that I would learn what that writer did that was successful but writing out her book. Then I should go write my own.

When I decided to write earnestly, I tried to do something similar with a Jayne Ann Krentz book. Or any of them. She has a distinct format and so I decided to copy it. I wasn't successful but again, the lesson for me was pretty clear.

I'm not suggesting that what the bad writer above did was this but it sounds like it. She took something that worked and then tried to rewrite it and make it her own. She was unsuccessful.

If she'd been a better writer or more creative perhaps, she could have taken the original book and used it as a starting point to create something her own. It's okay to read something and think, I want to steal that. The idea is to steal it by recreating it in your voice and style and making your readers know it's all you.

It's the difference between a hack and a writer. That lady was a true hack.

Agree?

Understanding Your Own Silence

2011-09-18T00:57:00.000-07:00

Writers can't usually write in chaos. At least, none of the writers I know can. When you have animals knocking over furniture and kids demanding attention and televisions blasting... it's nigh on impossible to hear your story and write it out.

So tonight when my daughter was gone (it was a sleepover but she only made it till midnight and then needed to come home) the house was quiet. Did I run to the computer like a greedy bitch and start typing maniacally away? No. Not even close.

I watched a movie and ate fast food. Then I watched a television show. I cleaned the stairs and the fireplace. And then I wrote.

Solitude is an amazing thing. It's necessary to recharge and to have silence. It's especially needful for creativity to grow. But just because there's quiet doesn't mean there's creativity.

I need to clean to get my muse to speak. I can't function in a dirty house. I have to have things put away and dishes done. I need also to take part of my time to channel some awareness outside myself. Therefore watching a movie or lstening to music or reading. It centers and calms me and then once that's all done, I feel ready to let my words flow.

We're all different I know. I'll even bet there's someone out there who loves to write as her house full of screaming kids collapses around her ears and the dogs howl at the moon.

I'm not her.

Reading ...

2011-09-17T14:38:00.000-07:00

I'm on a rereading binge. I have many, many books on my Kindle waiting to be read, crying out to be read, but for some reason I just want to settle in with books that I love.

So, I've reread The Guild Hunter series by Nalini Singh. It made a difference, reading them one after the other, because I noticed things I'd forgotten or had skimmed over and the character development for both Elena and Raphael is spread throughout the first three books and was much more obvious this time round.

Next up is the Kate Daniels series and then back to Singh for her Psy/Changling books. I'm also eyeing Elizabeth Vaughan's Warlord trilogy and the related books.

I'm between line edits on Song and the first edit on Mariposa and the Muse has taken a vacation. So I'm glad to have these old friends to keep me company. :-)

Demon Marked

2011-09-13T15:00:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I bought Demon Marked by Meljean Brook and .... I really liked it!

Why this one and not some others I've tried? Damned if I know.

Perhaps it was because Ash was a clean slate and the reader learned things about this world as she did. Perhaps it was cold, repressed Nick, who had a crappy upbringing and never lost sight of his goal - kill the demon who took his mother's place - and watching him thaw as he fell in love with Ash. Nick himself admits he's paranoid and it takes most of the book before he sees her clearly enough to completely trust her. I knew he was a goner when she could make him laugh against his will.

So now what do I do? Do I pick and choose which Guardian books to try? Or do I go back to the very beginning and soldier my way through? There's some weird folk in these books, not sure I want to get close and personal with them all. It just seems wrong, though, not to start at the beginning. Must be a touch of OCD kicking in there.

It's settled then. Wonder if I have the first book? Hmmm...shopping time!!

Hee Hee

2011-09-12T18:56:00.000-07:00

At last, at last, at last!

Lori is diving into one my favorite paranormal authors, Nalini Singh. She has started Angels' Blood. Whoop!!

Well, what I mean is, I'm very pleased at this development. Very pleased indeed. I just happened to mention it in passing, it's not like I nagged or anything. And I never talked for ten minutes straight (me, whose normal speech mode is tongue tied), no I never did.

Of course, I could, if I wasn't tongue tied. I would and ... oh hell, I have, lol.

I've often said - mostly to Lori, I admit but now I'm saying it to y'all - I can read any genre if there's good writing and a good storyline with characters you like and can relate to. Don't care what the background is, don't care if he gets a little hairy at times (I like hairy). A good writer can make me believe in the worlds they create, make me believe in true love between the most unlikely people.

And you know, deep down, all these 'monsters' are surprisingly needy when all's said and done. They want to be loved, they want to be needed, they all want a HEA.

It's just that there's different roads to get there, but get there we always do.

I'm gonna *ahem* talk - not nag, talk - to Lori about Kate Daniels next. :-)

Reviews Are a Writer's Best Friend

2011-09-11T10:49:00.000-07:00

I've been reading around the blogsphere and reading reviews for a long time and checking out Amazon and I've come to the conclusion that the only thing that really sells books are reviews.

Every time a reader takes a moment to give something two stars or five hearts or an in-depth analysis for why the story did or didn't work, the writer gains. The book prospers. The world, as we know it, is a better place.

There was a discussion on Smart Bitches about promotion for books and a I've been looking into promotion recently also... any author wants to get her work noticed. My conclusion is there is no effective promotion except readers leaving reviews on Amazon and Goodreads.

So as a small author and a big reader, I ask that if you read a book you loved, leave a comment on Amazon. If you read a book you hated, leave a comment on Amazon. If it left you in a meh state of mind, that's right, leave a comment on Amazon.

You can't do more any more effectively than doing that.

Stop the Online Sexism

2011-09-10T11:55:00.000-07:00

http://glutenfreegirl.com/warm-brown-rice-and-grilled-vegetable-salad/

Smart Bitches put up a post of links and there was a link to a writer talking about the difference in how he's treated in the world and how his sister is. The differences in being allowed, as a man, to be overweight, to be a parent however he chooses, to be himself. And how everything his sister says or does is ridiculed, criticized and mocked.

Then I read other links leading to the above. This woman is a food blogger and story teller and from the sounds of it, she's just a lovely human being. Her post makes me so sad because no matter how much society changes, there will always be someone hating women because they're women.

And yes, oftentimes it's other women too.There's a belief that happy women must be torn down. Women who don't need to be accepted by others because they accept themselves are dangerous women.

I've lived most of my life being ashamed of myself for being fat, ashamed for not being pretty. I hated being who I was because I didn't think I was good enough.

And then I was.

I was and I am good enough. I'm still fat and I'm not pretty. I'm not brilliant and I might not be good at math and .... I like who I am. I know my faults and I'm okay with having them. And I've discovered that the more comfortable I am being me, the less some people liked me.

When I stopped apologizing and crying and hiding myself, some people got pretty pissed. I don't care. I'm still happy with my life.

Online I exist mostly in a female environment. The idea that there are others out there using internet anonymity to tear down strangers and do their online venom spewing, saddens me. However, remaining aware and being vocal about our experiences are the first line in changing those experiences.

This is a conversation that we women need to have. And keep having. We need to let people know when it happens and we have to work together to silence the asshats who would try to silence us. Those who believe its okay to attack women for the sake of attacking women need to be the ones silenced.

This is one old fart who believes in being loud. And proud. And working with other women to keep all areas of our lives free of all violence.

(I hope this rant makes sense since it was a rush of typing fingers. I just got so pissed off reading the above. And I completely believe that if we work together in outing these men and their behavior, we will make a difference.)

New Releases

2011-09-08T07:03:00.000-07:00

Two of my favorite authors have recent new releases and I've read one of them. Pure joy!

Nalini Singh's Archangel's Blade absolutely blew me away.

I'm impressed as hell by the world she's set up in these books. The angels are eerily beautiful, completely inhuman (most of them), and over the top powerful. Juxtapositioned against our normal, mundane world, it makes for quite a contrast. New York City is still New York City, but with the addition of a cadre of angels, led by the Archangel Raphael and his Seven. Dmitri, the hero of this book, is his Second, and a cold blooded, amoral vampire.

I cannot tell you how much this book impressed me. By allowing the reader access to Dmitri's thoughts and memories, he becomes more understandable. One can empathize with him. I remember thinking, it could have happened no other way.

The heroine, Honor, began the book as a victim. It was fascinating to watch her overcome her fears and regain her power and purpose, just as it was to watch Dmitri change as he slowly falls in love with her.

The ending has been criticized, but I think it could have ended no other way. They were truly bonded and it wasn't a question of 'my way or the highway'; I think it was more along the lines of 'I want to be with you no matter which way is chosen'. Sorry, can't say more without spoilers

This is a powerful book. I don't mind blood and guts, although Singh has made me go 'yuck' a few times. But it all fits into her world and there's enough love to counteract the violence and the love usually wins.

This book can be put in the win column.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The other book released is Meljean Brook's Demon Marked, the new entry in her Guardian series.

Now, I totally love her Iron Seas series - all one novel and two novellas I've read. I'm on pins and needles for the next book, Heart of Steel.

But I've never been able to get into her Guardian series, although this new release tempts me mightily to try again, hoping it can be read as a stand alone. Reviews I've read have been good.

I just hate I haven't been able to dive into this world, because I love her online persona, her sense of humor and the Iron Seas books. So, I guess I'll have to get this book and try again. *grin*

Night Owl Reviews Contest

2011-09-05T16:01:00.000-07:00

http://www.nightowlreviews.com/nor/Pages/FullMoonDetails.aspx

There's a contest going on at Night Owl Reviews and one of the old farts is taking part. Check it out and then check out http://lorigreenauthor.blogspot.com/ to find my tag and win fabu prizes.

Or don't. But then don't complain to us when you don't win.

Hippity Hop

2011-09-04T06:45:00.000-07:00

A short time ago, the Smart Bitches had a thread titled 'Everybody Else Loved It But You Didn't Like it at All', in which people got to list and talk about popular books that just didn't appeal to them at all.

http://www.smartbitchestrashybooks.com/index.php/weblog/comments/everyone-else-loved-it-but-you-didnt-like-it-at-all/

I was surprised by the number of people who disliked Nora Roberts. With some it was just one book. Others wouldn't read her at all.

One of their main reasons was head hopping.

I've read Nora for years now. She was my reintroduction to Romance. I like just about everything she writes, formulatic or not.

The point to this post is that I'd never heard of head hopping. Not until I started surfing the online communities and started writing myself. I suspect most folks are like me. They must be, Nora is probably a multi-millionaire.

I had and have no problem following the storyline. I was never in doubt as to whose head I was in. I was shocked to find I'd head hopped in the very first paragraph I'd ever entered in anything and that was the first time I'd ever heard the word. I wasn't in the person's head, not really, but I can see now that the main character couldn't have known what the person was doing.

It's all very complicated, this writing. But La Nora makes it look easy. And I have to wonder if it's just the tight, internet Romance community that notices these things. Or are there millions of people out there who just don't give a damn as long as it's a good story with characters you can relate to.

As far as I'm concerned, Ms Roberts can head hop all she wants to, if that's what she's doing. Never bothered me and evidently it never bothered all the folks who made her a best seller

Who is Ryan Reynolds?

2011-09-02T09:59:00.001-07:00

Carolyn my darling,

you asked Lea, in the comments, who is Ryan Reynolds.

A little part of my soul bled. I, like you, might love the dark seductive Latin types with the dark eyes and lilting accents but there's something to be said about the blonde men with the big smiles and the quick come backs that make you laugh and lust.

Ryan Reynolds is American goodness. (I was lukewarm about him and then Blade 3 happened and I loved him to pieces. Don't care much for the woman beating, tax dodging Snipes but Ryan is the reason I've watched that movie again and again and again and again...)

So ma'am, meet Ryan Reynolds.

I believe I shall send you a movie or two. Because some men are worth momentary Spanish lapses.

Well, Lookie Here...

2011-09-01T15:43:00.000-07:00

I have a new bookcover, y'all. :-D

It's for Song of Life, releasing February 2012. (This time I asked my editor.)

Isn't it purty?

Now I have to figure out how to add another book to my 'official' site. This will be accomplished with much knashing of teeth and muttered curses, false starts and cries of 'oh no you didn't, you bassard!' but it will be accomplished.

I've liked all my covers so far - is this unusual? I have to say Lyrical really tries to deliver the author's vision for their cover. For me, they have more than succeeded.

Whoop!!

Sex-ay! So Sex-ay!

2011-08-30T18:49:00.000-07:00

These are all wrestlers with the WWE. Someone needs to write romances about them.

They are so freaking hot!!

In Other Words

2011-08-26T11:09:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my group feeds were exploding from some yak editor who did a blog post of the 10 words that editors hate and among the words were: love, spirit, forever, heart.... you know, romance words. Of course all the romance writers were all screech and daggers out.

I guess on Twitter someone guided Angela James, exec editor of Carina to it and she laughed at it and said no doubt someone was joking.

Got me to thinking though.

My daughter is ten years old. We've been really having a great summer and we've been able to concentrate a lot recently on ourselves. Not just hanging out but also we've been shopping for fall, getting our house more put together and having fun. And my daughter is so appreciative. Super appreciative. Annoyingly appreciative.

She thanks me constantly. Such as: last night we went out and I decided on the spur of the moment to go to a local arcade to play games and have dinner. We did arcade games, did a 4D movie, had burgers and salad and hung out till closing. She thanked me for dinner, she thanked me for surprising her, she thanked me for playing, she thanked me for the fun ad nauseum.

I finally asked her to stop saying thank you and she told me she likes saying it. Okay. So I thanked her for being so appreciative and we went on with our night. And later I told her that I love her and being with her makes my heart full. And I finally realized why my daughter was thanking me.

My daughter thanks me because it's her way of saying I love you. She's at that age where she doesn't want to be a baby and hang all over her mama and say the words but she totally is my baby and wants to hang on me and say those words. So instead she leans against me to look at what I do, she tells me she's afraid of something when she wants to get cuddled and she thanks me because she wants me to know she loves me.

I get it and I love it. I use the words heart and love and forever. She uses other words. It all means the same thing.

And by the way, the "editor" who wrote that blog post is still a stupid bitch. Just sayin'.

Letters From Greece

2011-08-23T09:21:00.000-07:00

Awhile back Carolyn and I decided to send our piece de shit, The Bodice Rippers, to a few pubs to see what would happen. The publishing world collapsed and everybody was forced to self publish their work after that.

So then we finally finially finished another story we wrot together, Letters From Greece, and we've sent that baby out too.

So far we have 2 publishers who have it in submissions. It was sent on July 8 and we're waiting. I think it's always good news when it isn't an immediate rejection.

Then again, Bodice was with Carina for 20 weeks before they said they couldn't publish it because they were voilently ill after reading it. So who knows what will happen this time.

Fingers crossed.